the best damn thing

in which addie and new ideas

2010-12-31T12:50:00.002+08:00

New ideas for the new 2011

2011 here and its time to do something fun

i love writing, music, food and photography

so i think i am gonna start on a blog with those. I had a whole lot of photos i took (only on the good days) and well i am gonna share them. I think so thats a new hobby to start this 2011

:)

xoxo

in which addie and a wordy post

2010-12-20T21:47:00.002+08:00

hello hippies!

so that night with J was really nice, we talked about so many things which reminded me of a very special someone whom i used to talk all night long with, though things had change and we all move along the way we wanted, no longer friends but i just want to tell you, thank you for spending those good times with me.

so J was saying about how people meet and what made them close.

for me, it wasnt about how long you know the person but its about those sparks you both have.

for J, well she blogged about it! haha and i promised her i would. she said its about feelings and lots of words.

i think we are all brought together somehow or another, sometimes the one we thought we would be BFF never turn out to be and those we least expected became the closest BFF ever, regardless of age or sex, u just got drawn to he or her.

who said a guy and a girl cant be friend but only lover? its somewhat like in a relationship but take away the hot love you have for each other. & so we were saying the weirdest friend we ever had. for me were a couple of them whom i still keep in contact with and kinda close.

a mistaken identity on a friend's party

a friend's friend (oh i love this friend and how complex we are)

friend's friends (yes, the entire crew!)

thought was someone's bf that i add/defriend/add on fb who happen to be my lecture mate

a set up date by J for the bbq

and well those are those that i thought i never ever be in contact with again which became kinda close to me

and i must say, i love the way things are now. with so many people i met via so many people. but there is still that few whom i have yet to met...

like:

190!

yes 190! i know its been like a while, so mr 190 when are we connecting dream? let today be the 3rd time, k?

haha!

anyway, town been pretty boring, or maybe i been there too much and i dont see any more cute 190! so lets hope my next trip down, i will see at least 3?

oh and guess the most funniest thing ever happen? so J and i were over at town that day and i saw this guy again! not the guy who i reach his arm and FYI i am not short! he is like freaking tall! i guess 200m tall?

this guy whom the last time i saw was injured but he looked kinda cute, not 190 cute but you know. so i saw him again that other day and i swear he remembered me! haha it got J jumping and wanting to stalk him after that!

we crossed path and i was busy trying to tie my hair and according to J, he was looking at me as if we know each other. and J pushed me and it took me a while to remember who he was! haha well, he got to remember who i am cause i literally blocked his way the other time. i mean i wanted to go right and he wanted to go left and well! haha. so i kinda told J about him and it let to her wanting to stalk him after that...

happy day for us though, we saw our eye-candies although for me wasnt my ideal 190 but well.. hahah i know i will have one special 190! haha

anyway i got side track my by longest friend ever! whom i havent talk to him for a long time!

so i shall blog another day.

till then
smile and stay beautiful
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie is at this point

2010-11-12T00:09:00.002+08:00

i am officially at this point of this whole crap that i dont give a shit about it. you can rot and die, and i wont move a bit.

i tried thrice, and i gotten 3 rolled eye. so i am done. out. you wanna truce, you got to earn it now. i am done. seriously you got lonely so now you want me back? okay, see that queue? go take a number and join it.

seriously sheesh..

we cant get out into a proper friendship even when we age can we? i saw 3 different group age friendship war. one in the teens, other in the 30s/40s, lastly in the 50s.

seriously we never grow out of high school, do we? or worst play school... why cant we just be honest with each other? just do and live what point you like? no? why do we have mask and when the night comes, you curse each one?

I am done with all this shit. i am bored with all those. it seems fun at first than you got bored and you went to a point where you just cant be bother. yeah, i am at there now.

its hard being swiss when you get drag into every possible fires.

like i said.

if you want to play fire with me, i play fire with fire, just dont get burn.

oh, now i am not into the mood to get into a fight, war or whatever you all are plotting.

but a head up, when i blow, you better run.

xoxo
smile and stay beautiful
addie(:

in which addie and opening act

2010-10-30T21:09:00.002+08:00

curtains draw.
lights shine.
people talk, sing, dance.

everything happens in a order.

I woke up this morning to a different tune, a tune which reminds me of body jam.

yes people, i finally attend the class. like finally! thank you very much! it was very enjoying. very fun indeed. my VIP pass just ended as of today(or is it tomorrow?) anyway, i miss lesson today. thinking i have another lesson on my list today. which( i dont want to talk about)

i have a hard time thinking should i write again. both my blog and short stories... addie needs to be really emotional to write a good story. yet i am not that emotional. hyper at least. not emotional. so i am moving baby steps. writing my blog and from there to my short stories. I will write them, and finish them. I promise. not write the head and half of the body and leave it hanging. hanging like a dead meat in the air. waiting for anyone to eat them. just hang there and bled. bled and bled and bled.

relax i am fine. very fine. told you i am hyper. pretty unstable now. very unstable.

So i need ideas to start on a story soon. need a someone to take good photos of/for me now. i think i am going to start posting photos on my blog, link them to my life and all.. saw AB's blog. its awesome. with mostly place into different parts of the blog, photo, him, music...things like that. labels. i need labels.

i need to label people. I am wondering why do human act the way they do. I simply dont understand why. Am I like an animal? when you are the human looking at me looking at you? but deeply you are here to watch me react to your actions and when you know i have given up, you walked away, telling yourself that you need to catch my attention the next round.

hmm...

why am i always half done? medium rare. always. my stories, my guitar, my drama(okay not really), my life, my weight.

ahh.. my weight. Thanks for the little celebration. Its really nice and sweet of you guys! and i sworn i gain like 2Kg after that day! haha Kidding, i didnt! but thank you. I am left with 8 more! cant wait. should, hopefully by the end of this year. which i am pretty proud that i did it. pissed at the same time for letting myself go like that before. need to stop blaming what happen that time when i let go of myself.

now, just now, i am returning to me. getting stronger. facing life with a back up of life.

seriously, maturity dont come with age. you cant blame on parents or family background. you cant. maturity is something that you grow and culture it. you learn it yourself. you "upgrade" yourself. no one teaches me maturity. of course the basic, yes. but not the I, I am now. I came from a life of lessons. and i am still learning. so should you, which i suppose you should at this point in life. when you are entering adult hood. for me, my teenager-hood has a certain good years to enjoy and yet i am feeling so much mature than you are.

and now i am confuse. do i want you as my friend or enemy? who wants enemy? only you do. i am always in peace till you step on my line of defense. till you did the utterly horrifying things to our friendship. and i wonder did what happen to * and i, became the way i treat friends now. from another angle? i doubt that. i made new friendships and i have them way better in control than this. simple childish is all i can say. and those who known me before, prefer the me now than before, lets just say, my trip to stay with my brother really make me grow alot.

sometimes, you are blessed by this little things and it changes you for life. in a good way.

till then,
stay beautiful and smiles
xoxo,
addie(:

in which addie and perfect game

2010-10-09T18:05:00.002+08:00

only one game is needed this time.

run and hide people, run and hide.

today marks the start of this game, though it should be tonight but lets all have a 4 hours head start.

there is only one rule. and thats never ever be lower than anyone.

it only applies to me. so yeah.

i will be gone for the next few days, those who are checking right here, should know where to contact me.

i finally understand what make a human that desperate. all those needs. its disgusting yet it makes us all human.

on a lighter note, i dont have my 3rd dream, but i do hope it comes soon.

as always,
smile and stay beautiful
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and hello bright blue eye!

2010-09-25T00:14:00.002+08:00

hello bright blue eye! *love*

for once in my life i gotta admit that i love blue eye cutie! This guy i met that tue was just simply good in things we both do!

haha

i had another dream about my previous dream! 2nd time! how awesome! lately i been too lazy to update but however and i am just popping by cause i cant get things off my mind!

finally i clear my closet! nope, no skeleton. haha but found some real interesting stuff.

oh let me have the 3rd dream or at least dream again, its been a long time.

till then
stay beautiful
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and dream

2010-09-03T15:50:00.001+08:00

PLEASE TAKE ME BACK TO MY DREAM YESTERDAY! I BEG YOU!!

god, i love love love my dream yesterday. how awesome is that dream? come on, let it be real, living in this so amazing place and amazing that one person!

alright, sleep tight, i am lying in bed till i get my dream back. why must the phone both ring in my dream and in reality? darn u stupid phone!

till then, smile and stay beautiful
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and a freaking hard tart paper

2010-09-02T21:59:00.004+08:00

my paper was a hard tart paper. anyway. i seriously hate it

moving on, i caught EXAM! it was seriously good. its like saw, take out all the gross part and yeah.

so its like there are 80 mins to answer a question. get this, there were 8 candidate. and there were rule lay out. go watch the show, or i will be giving it all out.

There were rules to follow, one piece of paper was given to each candidate and its just a blank piece of paper.

he said:

There is one question before you and one answer is required. No talking to the police officer or him, destroying your paper in any ways, you will be disqualify. Any Question? You may start.

that is base on what i can remember. Anyway, so all the action began.

it a good twist.

for me at least.

alright next stop (insert movie tittle) , i guess. hahah

till then
smile and stay beautiful
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and retarded list

2010-08-29T17:02:00.003+08:00

okay my retarded list shall remain in my box till after the sept 16!

i cant wait! let me be done with it with one!

final papers are starting so soon! so everything to finish soon!

finally, its okay to dream a little dream.

i guess when people ask me something and i dont wish to answer, i just simply say: 'cause i am a LEO, go google!

hahah.

oh yeah.

10 down, 13 to go!

till then
smile and stay beautiful
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and words.

2010-08-23T16:59:00.002+08:00

this is my 2nd post of the day. not something that i usually do but here i am.

I am a writer, a dreamer, a artist, an actress, a director, a judge, a sister, a daughter, a lover, a student, one somebody.

I am so tired of not going for things i like
not being different
not being the person i am when i am alone.

i have great mind. i paint pictures before i fall asleep. i dream and write them down, hopefully just hopefully i am good enough to be chosen. i never ever once submit my work. never ever once put my heart out in doing the exam. never ever once be true to myself.

i felt like i am such a joke. i will never know where i stand if i dont perform. i wanna get into a great improvise school. be me. make a name. i know i will get there. this sucks. i never think so much before. never felt like someone in the movie where you know its just pure acting.

anyway, i watched The Fall....

seriously my best movie ever, yes hot shot in it so what? haha he is freaking tall man! urgh!! anyway, i like the way it was written, the pure innocence of this younger actress. she is just wonderful. you dont see much acting when the 2 actors talked. its just talking to a little kid, telling her stories. painting her world. storyteller <3

anyway he had to fake the ability to walk the whole time, just to convince his little costar and almost everyone in the set. not the director... duh and the director is simply amazing! i wanna meet him. all of them. and saw the part behind the scene where he had to tell her the truth. she looked so shocked, so cute! omg, so lucky!

JEALOUS jealous! hahah

uber super super :)

anyway, i know its like a bit retard to like a celebrity. haha. but on the other hand. a few of my friends already know what type of guy i go for... haha time to enjoy teenage-hood without a lover! haha i am still very very young and still looking. till i meet one.

as always

till then. smile and stay beautiful
xoxo
addie(:

PS: bright smile people!

in which addie and a whole bunch of stuff

2010-08-23T13:33:00.004+08:00

someone added a blog counter thingy on my blog for me to track down how many people visited my blog. though i dont know who but i do know the IP address and so on. the worst part is: there are so many IP address and i wanna the country... i know theres a way to see it but however i couldnt be bother...

anyway who. i think i need to delete some of my post. its just getting a little too much of information on things i dont wish to talk about. & i know. wth... why is my blog address on the 3rd of goggle list when it was asked in a search? crap... a little privacy please...

so much for a unknown blog. well, thats what they say when you got a blog, facebook and things like that. none of which is safe. even internet banking i assume....

so, life been a little unfair to me.

that's life huh...

suddenly it hits me. the whole line of event that happen. omg. omg. how can i not see it. stupid me.. when u start reasoning out the event. everything its so perfect that its a lie. a big one. damn.

till then, smile and stay beautiful.
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and lovers

2010-08-22T00:12:00.002+08:00

fine! i take back my words! what i said about chin and dimples.. haha i do look for guy who have that and a few other details..... god what a freak...

anyway. i google on that one idol that i thought he dont have the chin and turn up he do have that chin.. and guess what i found next???

hold it...

alright! he might be joining twilight gang! yeah for me.. duh... hope he gets in and what the hell like twilight and harry potter gets like 2 parts in their next upcoming movie. what a rip off! yucks! what a bitch.. i mean why prolong the show? you can do like a come back or a remake once in the blue blue blue moon. why prolong the show and take more money out from the fans?

of course by casting my idol in it.... NO! it wont make a change for crying out loud. NO SIR! but then on the other hand. i think i will watch him played on a huge screen wont i?

maybe, unless i am still in town thats for sure.

anyway, i am so much happy that the world finally find peace with me &... that i finally can forget and let go. now that we are back into different parts of the country/earth. I am so so so much open happy :)

PS: i am not a stalker. i just search the drama show that i was watching and found his face tag on his fb page.

thats the end of this post for this dearly girl... I am coming home baby!

till then, smile and stay beautiful(:
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and an open heart

2010-08-19T21:12:00.002+08:00

Whats the true meaning of letting go? hopping that sour milk aint sour?

to love and let someone into your life is hard. to forget about good times its even harder.

human minds are such a funny thing. it can blocked out bad things and it can blocked out things we chose to remember, for instant, i can ask you to think all the events happened today. but i want you to think of a different outcome.

example: if you happen to bath before having a meal, try to picture yourself having a meal before your bath.

get my flow? i hope you do. :)

so after you kept thinking on that, convince yourself that the picture outcome was the true incident. i am sure you are able to do it. and then keep your eyes close and think through the rest of the event.

now read the rest of this post.(:

i have no idea what make me a real happy person lately. perhaps my mind and heart are both open and allowing new events to take place. and of course catching up with things i been lacking behind since day 1. i finally put down this rebel side and focus on this main event.

so i been thinking about having a new blog url. but i dont want to give up my url. hahah. hmm. what will happen if i grow a little older and meet more parts of the world and start loving the world? will i read my old post and start laughing at myself? i am already doing that now.

however they say, thats how we human grow. we have a past entry of our life and we look back on it once in a while and we laugh at ourselves. i had a book of my past event since i was like 5 i guess. i cant really remember. there wasnt date to prove when was my first entry. of course back then, they were real hard copy and not this blog. even now, i find pen-ing down my thoughts much "real" than this.

and little things made me wonder why do i bother writing it down.

but now that every little things we did.

okay back to the change of event. so now i am sure you remember very clearly that the little twist of event you made. can your mind replay the whole day to you with that little lie you had?

if you cant get my point, write down events happened today and on another piece of paper write down things you had changed. read them back in like a week or so. read the remake paper.

i am sure your mind will agree with you that remake was the true whole event.

maybe you get my flow, maybe you dont.

grab yourself a gelato, 'cause i am getting one. :)

till then, smile & stay beautiful.
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and between heats

2010-08-18T20:22:00.002+08:00

between the heat that i had with you; they are love, tears, joy and more heat.

reason i was not in any contact with anyone these couple of weeks, mainly, there is no true reason. for those i did come in contact in, via anything, count yourself lucky...

nah nah, i am not going to have a major depression or somewhat related event. i am just tired. tired of being someone that everyone would love. i felt like a pushover and i am not a pushover, i am slowly learning to say no to things that are not that important for now. saying no to high drinks and banging music, saying no to you.

for now, till 3 of my papers are over and i will be back. for now, i need my soul to be save while i carry on making new masks.

and yes, i read all of your tweets, walls and blogs. i had them bookmark. so for those who think i went into rehab, how i wish i were in rehab. i am just learning simple things for now. and to those i recently turn down, i promise you, i will make it up for you. :)

now lets pray that this rain will wash away what happen between us and may we forget that night.

till then
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and vampires suck

2010-08-03T20:43:00.002+08:00

vampires suck movie

let me tell you. it really sucked!

unless the whole point is telling die hard twilight fans that twilight is draggy, i get it. The show itself was funny for the first 30mins and it gets on being real draggy towards the end.

funny, and boring though.

but you got to watch twilight to fully understand the jokes! haha i love it when gossip girl talking crashes with becca's narration.

till then
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and aussie guy

2010-08-01T17:54:00.002+08:00

suddenly looking back at photos in my room. & its finally time to throw away those unless photos, i saw a few photos on this aussie trip i had with my school band, trust me, it wasnt at all fun until knowing this other few guys from sister school of my secondary school.

anyway, i totally remember why i took photo with this other aussie guy who is not in band! hahah. I remembered when we were on our break at one exchange band with this school and I totally dont like my section thus i am always hanging out with some other sections. anyway, so i was walking around and i went near a pool. it was beside a hostel and there were people dancing outside the hostel girls mostly and they were dancing to some songs. & this guy stood beside me started talking to me. it was when i had a mouthful of water cooler water and i swear it was dripping from my mouth. He was the kinda guy i like! tall, big, you know! hahah anyway, so he asked me to join him for a swim and talked really a lot. i cant remember his name now or how his face really look like, but that over everything was the highlight of that day. :)

oh, the package was from her! oh my god. i freaking love it. its all in purple with my A printed on always everything! i posted up on fb and now its the desktop picture! lunch with my cousin and distant cousins were swell, plus one amazing jumpshot! haha waiting for him to get back from his trip and he will upload it.

for now its writing thank you cards and also mugging for my dear exams!

till then
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and presents!

2010-07-29T21:01:00.004+08:00

okay thank you all for thy wonderful presents! even though today was my fault that i was late. come on a girl got to finish up her homework and i havent get started on F1 project!

going to the post and get my item from Jami, hopefully its from her! chat with Jordyn in class today. so awesome that its summer and she got to stay up late and i get to chat with her in class as the teacher going through tips for exam next friday. oh right like her tips going to help. all she did was, read from your notes. read from your notes!! however talking with Jordyn didnt went well, she got disconnected like countless of times and i just wonder what on earth happen.

so time for plan!

i need to make a date with R, my cousins(both distant and local) she is leaving soon and he supposes to make a date, but its just hanging there.

and the usual homework, study and exam!

and i am looking forward for my trips! planing a short getaway to Christmas island before the gang leaves and also koera! hell yeah i got confirm... back to zurich, SA. hope to visit Jami like real soon. I am starting to miss them alot! some what the F1 project though it had nothing to do with VIP party, with drunk rich crazy ass people screaming at the back of your head, but thats was the first time i enjoy being with the whole family! she is a wonderful person! okay. ah, spring break with J to either swiss or US! plan this plan that. all plans expect studying! like i have lost all interest in it.

anyway, dont ask me what happen, this is what i am going to do, base on whats that is left, i am going to make magic happen!

come and think of it. this year is a real deal. traveling around, meeting so many new friends, forgetting what had happen! getting to know more about myself and those kinda friend that i should be hanging with.

they say, you cant change if you are still with the same group of friends.

anyway, its going to the end of july, a fresh start of aug and maybe a trip or two down the memory lane. i should be back on track...

till then
xoxo
-addie(:

oh before i forget... thanks love! :D

in which addie and flashes

2010-07-28T21:53:00.007+08:00

flashes. those thing that flash pass you.

i seriously wanna go total metal soon. and i cant wait to start learning guitar again. yeah i am not going to learn a level and give up. finally took out my old dusty guitar played a few notes. dude, i am going to trade for a electrical guitar. i just wanna do something rock and roll! minus the screaming and shouting! heavy heavy metal.

talking about court, damn the case is settle. not going to press charges. I am so looking forward for court hearing. however it was paid off. rushing off after my marketing paper which i dont regret not taking marketing or accounting like the rest of my classmate from secondary school. thank god! i have no interest in marketing! wonder how did i pull through my years in POA, but it was so easy back then! hmm... wait, its 2 different things!

anyway, A13 is leaving on tour! damn you people who dont have to study and peruse your interest. yes i know i miss my chance! shut up i dont want to hear about it. anyway, have fun. buy me snow globe from places you go! you know how much i love snow globe! :)

till then
xoxo
addie(:

why do i have this feeling that 4 years later? it will be just you and me back in the empty room, looking at each other and filling our minds with memories?

in which addie says till then

2010-07-24T23:47:00.004+08:00

till then is what i am going to say for all you readers who read my blog. no, i am not going to shut it down 'cause i dont feel like it. but i will be posting updates on A13 even though it has no relation at all.

I had it enough with some people who have this constant needs of knowing. i know, curiosity kills the cat but that cat obviously has 9 lives! i had it with it. i am so eff up with this kinda person. if you were meant to know, you will know. stop asking or fishing from me. just like today when that stupid woman has to know every single thing about me. HELLO, let me ask you, do you see me questioning you? no you dont! i am just being nice 'cause you are someone's date which i think that someone should have a change of degree! damn, and where did i get my flu from? oh come on, seriously? you gotta ask? let me tell you, from your freaking constant asking! get a life you moron! if you can sense that i am looking away, coughing even though i am not coughing, rolling my eyes over like a zillion times and sighing non stop dont give it away... how about me at the end telling you, i dont have to tell you everything, 'cause at the end of the day, we both know we aint seeing each other much after this on going event ends. for the love of god! leave me alone and stop trying to know me! 'cause i am not like you, i dont have to tell you how many skeletons are there in my closet! and i dont have to report to you!

just tell me i am wrong... that telling people things are good even though its non of their freaking business. tell me that i am wrong that there will be always something you dont tell someone. just tell me that i am wrong that i dont find the need to talk to you. & why do i have to let you into my life and that my friend, was a terrible mistake!

okay enough with this kind of people. and of course there are those that keep guessing and getting no where. enough already. just tell me J, which freaking part did i move wrong? was it the knight? or the bishop? just check mate me already so we can get on with it! URGH!! ohh...was it the part when i said tell J that the bitch is back?

FYI, our fate as friends had already ended.

so anyway, back to the part where i said i wanna update on the other blog, i had someone read my blog that i wish i had not told about. what was i thinking? stupid flu meds! damn the label was right. "it may cause drowsiness" you should put it on the back, also it may make you do some weird actions like telling someone your blog link even though you dont meant it! god damn it addie, seriously what were you thinking?

so i got suggestion like lock the blog, move the address, but i am going to leave it un-update for a while and who knows, maybe after 2 years, i will create a brand new one. and this will be gone. i started this blog when i am sick and bored at home 3 years ago. so now i will let this active blog die a little and come back again when i know that someone is not reading.

i am sorry, if you were meant to know, you will know. the world is simple and understandable to you, that 'cause you havent step out of your well and look at the world from my eyes. if you step on this line again. i will make sure, you will know the meaning of UP YOURS.

till then
xoxo
addie(:

PS: you were not meant to be.

in which addie and post 333

2010-07-24T10:29:00.004+08:00

post 333... half devil eh...

anyway, i been ill this couple of days so i missed out plenty of social events :( but i did caught up on my sleep! i so dont feel like going for that 100mins later.. kinda feel like sleeping.

bright eyes people, i finally understand the true meaning of colours. But somewhat i been fooled over and over again. seriously, my words are harsh but they are the truth.

i shall not blog further 'cause i dont find the use of updating my feelings now.

maybe i should get a twitter account eh?

till then
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie is in love

2010-07-20T21:06:00.002+08:00

mood shows, point taken.

reason that i have been cold these few days are....

I AM EFFING IN LOVE WITH ROCK N ROLL... okay not that bad. but slightly a bit in love with them. okay. got to stop listening to them so i be back to normal!

any who... oh well

time to play different cards now, shall we?

till then
xoxo
addie(:

PS: enough of the ripping you little bitch! quotes are fine but not ripping and crediting under you. & thats the reason why i stop posting short stories online. D:

in which addie has a little some mental problem today!

2010-07-19T17:54:00.003+08:00

i have a little tiny mental problem today!

I have no idea what kick start this whole crazy shit in me. Guess i am so happy that almost everything is going my way. finally eh! With the new draft, more time for me to enjoy my life with my school work. and yes, i took some time off from A13. of course not forgetting writing my short stories and music. things that i truly love... Let's just say stories are going well, but for music, i think i need to hire someone to write the notes while i write the words.

anyway, i am finally sitting my ass down to do some crapy national education, while in the mist of blogging! anyway, you are asking a weird minded girl to write what makes country, country-ish? come on. seriously if i were to write my personal opinions, i am in major trouble. I mean i travel and i learn from different parts of the world. you learn, you grow, you fall in love with the good and change the bad. if you really wanna me to write, lets just say, i do really want to pass this darn module. i love the country i am from, but i hate it at the same time. however, i cant say its a love-hate relationship. Thats me and .....(till i find that person!)

so i have a little too many people reading my blog! ZAZ is one of them. and well the next name i am going to put its kinda wrong, ah! riseman! hahah or is that what it is. getting names from email account is a good idea. anyway so hello miss zaz! thanks for stalking me! hahaha but dont just read the first line! hahah so, you getting to know a little more about me eh... hahah..

okay going back to me and my dream *praying* cute guys! so they say swiss guys are lovers and the girls are hard to be chat on. hmm lets just see. there are so many article out there, just a little exercise and google them! those 2 person founded google, so use them people! dont be lazy, come on.

so lets see, i want my bloodline to be even more mixed. and i have the war to thank too. oh well, i missed all the tales that day, so i need to ask them to repeat the stories even they are so called "we-dont-mention-about-it"hey! its really runs in the family, just ask my dear cousin who almost burnt his hair!

& whats wrong with me? i am falling in love with british accent! save me!! i do love all accent but my top is/was scottish but now! & i thought my life of watching E4 non-stop had come to an end for now. no more harry hill and blah and things like that. now i am listening to UK hits, shows, movies and picking their accent. OH MY GOSH! i am in the queen zone... but you cant have 2 queens under one roof. they are great, its at least better picking up their accent over some others yeah? or not? anyway, i have my own little accent! :)

gosh! i think my rock and roll is getting a little too F-ish, please dont let me pick those word up.

yeah or nay on national education, truth or the truth chose to hear? truth always hurt and i shall go with the truth chose to hear. come on, i am in enough trouble for this semester.

to thank for: love ya bitches! :D

till then
xoxo
addie(:

in which addie warns dont rip

2010-07-17T20:31:00.002+08:00

i had it with people who rip from my blog and put them into their own words and said they said it! WTF!!! i mean hello, i think i should go get a copyright for my words. i know i may create words in the mist of the air and i really dont like people to use them. call me selfish, call me whatever ya wanna call me. I just dont like it.

Finally finished tons of reports but i am still running out of my freaking time! exams are so close and sep 16 is reaching! i hope its on sep 16. pray pray pray let me do it once and get over with! damn i havent get my cert from drama. should call them asap.. this year, one thing off my mind was sep drama exam! hello, kiss my freaking ass! you bitches said i cant do you, take your words back ASS! ya queen is always queen! :P

okay i am in a rock and roll mode now. today was the most boring day ever! i mean i dont even have to freaking attend! the only fun part was the part where i get to go home! wasted. however, i manage to finish one of my report in the waiting and wasting day!

i missed all my ever life of wasting.

i am totally into rock now. no idea why, but hello, who wanna create a band with me? okay i wanna go metal now! maybe i am in my rebel mode now, and all my rock got to do with almost every feeling you can swing within a cycle. Am not talking about PMS cycle! godness! just swing cycle.

i should start writing short stories again yeah? i mean i think i should but only after sep 16 & when school holidays finally kicks in.

i am getting old! my birthday is reaching. and i swear the whole A13 is so darn far away! :( crap shit i wanna go back! i dont do skype for birthday! :(

anyway, i think i am going to turn in now. since i am so space away...

anyway......

had dinner with R on friday, in town near where grand's old house was. i really miss there, the hill, the running around, the everything. everything seems to fall after they moved away from there. you went to a better place and i miss you. i really do. i saw your photo today and boy i thought how unfair it was to let you go at such a young age, you have no idea how being a teenager is. remember, when we used to play family? when you drag every single one of us into the room. remember, when you asked my mum where i was when i was in dance class? remember at the very end, you always look for me, even though we dont talk the same topic? Remember how you told everyone that if i dont go, you wont go? and you try you very best to be with me, the first and last photo we ever had as a group? i really miss you. if you are still around, i wont be so freaking lonely at all the gathering. i really miss you, i remember the first moment i heard the bad story, i coped myself up, cause i know, its over, it good that you went away. but i miss you. lets see, now you would be telling me stories about chasing skirt and be with me at all gathering, i cant look at your brother without thinking about you. you was the closest one. and i felt bad to not send you off, cause i had drama exam? but you blessed me through my entire exam! new year was different without you playing 21 with me. & grand, that old house was where you used to give me $ and scolded EH for taking them from me. and you give me coins to gamble.

ah crap, no tears addie!

till then
xoxo
addie

in which addie had her taste of best music

2010-07-12T21:38:00.003+08:00

to all great music artist out there, oh yeah baby!

i had a taste of music and i am wanting it more. I am so going to hold on to that dream and i will have a stage of my own with my own band and rocking my way through!

Thanks for the lovely dream and i finally found my strength to carry on. :)

we can not wait forever, cause forever wont be here. it will be here. I believe it will be. my hopes, my string. I am holding on. Thats my string, I am HOLDING ON TO IT!

xoxo
addie(:

in which addie writes a note to herself

2010-07-08T17:46:00.002+08:00

a note to self:

do you remember that year when you were told you wont going to make it? then you prove to every single one of them you can. and you got the best? do you remember? and you found your stand and stood in it till the very end, despite all the odds?

my answer, yes. i love that moment.

Which part of my plan I went wrong? S was right, I need a new contract, or i can do what H does, concentrate on studies first. But i have the taste of freedom, why do i want to go back?

decision decision....

A13 was awesome, price to pay, my results

P&C results wasnt my best effort, but i gain both A13 and result.

so addie, make up your mind! decision, decision.

if only almost perfect was simply perfect.

now is the time to change my contract, i think. A13, you guys are my love so what should i do?

xoxo
addie(:

if i have the same strength that move me through courses of A13 on studies, that wont be my first yet last...

in which addie loves the idea of idea

2010-07-04T13:06:00.003+08:00

ideas, everywhere. things of one thoughts.

i wanna have bbq again. its like having bbq, you know your food going to be cook. sometimes you get burnt, but soon, soon your food will be cook and you get to eat them. you sweat due to heat and your face turns red, but you know you will get your food.

think about it. or i might be blahing cause i think i am a little hangover. someone once told me that no matter how hard you try, you wont get there, its how heart you try, you will get there. the heart and mind have to be one. and you will be there.

my life is like a stock market. it rise then fall then rise again. so now i am climbing, moving up. i will do whatever it takes to be on the spotlight of gory!

till then, i shall enjoy my moments of watching the world cup! i heart germany! :D KLOSE rule! whatever, everyone in the team rule! :D

happy 4th july to my american friends! :D i wish i can be there to view the fireworks or have a blast with you guys!

xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and eclipse & knight and day

2010-07-02T19:05:00.002+08:00

okay, movie review time! not much that i would really say about if it good or not.

twilight saga : eclipse.

as compare to the previous twilight saga : new moon, this show isnt draggy at all. not as draggy as new moon but its less draggy, still draggy though. this show is all about bella, edward, jacob. *duh*

so i would give a 10/10 for jacob taking off his shirt almost 90% of the movie! hotness! somewhat i love his butt! and its such a pun in the movie when jacob said "i am much hotter compare to you*" to edward.

*or somewhat that.

such a pun!! talyor is so much hotter than rob, i mean rob, are you on drug or what? you look like a drug vampire! oh my god. talking about the opening scene when they close up on rob's teeth? i dont know he smokes but by looking at his teeth, he does. major eww on the teeth... so it was confirm by my friend that rob does smoke, oh well...

back to the whole thing, finally nice to see the whole fighting scene, i wish there are more. so much more! more more more more more! really awesome with the werewolf. but there was a part when riley was drag by one of the werewolf, his eyes gave it away that he was acting with a machine or so. his actions and all. but overall, the animal werewolves are cute!!!

jessica's speech on high school graduation was something i like. :)

okay i must say the opening scene dont seems to start like the previous 2. its more like a horror movie opening or something. thats nice, its really a great dark opening!and its nice, the whole day until i saw rob's teeth, sorry but yeah.

Knight and day:

okay when i watch this show, i felt old. really old. seeing the 2 main roles, i felt so old, they look so old in the show! i watch their show growing up and gosh they look so old and i felt so old.

anyway, movie was really funny! very funny! and its more action as compare to twilight. i like the setting they chose, everything is really nice and funny. plots are unique with twits along the way.

its like a 007 and mission impossible mix. not that bad. kinda good actually.

***

anyway, who am i to judge? those are base on my opinions, i do enjoy watching those 2 movies and all. you would have to watch to judge. :) i am no movie critic & writing those 2 for a dear friend. :) so i dont know whats the format of writing them or what so ever. just a simple short update for someone i love and hate at the same time. for you H, since you wrote 2 movies review for me so i wrote back. plus, your review are so much better than mine. :D i jsut bitch around me and stuff..

so i love today with my 2 besties!

till then.

xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and my L I fe

2010-06-29T16:05:00.004+08:00

life. not a word i want to link all and everything together.

i am a teenager but i think i had a quarter life crisis, who said you need to be 40ish to have that? i am less than 20 and thus makes that quarter life crisis.

i was told previously that my life was pretty much plan for me and i can choose to do whatever i like after i completed my quest on my lay out life. now that i am getting bored with my lay out life, can i move on and do whatever i want?

it come a price of quitting school.

yes, school is important. i am not a person who cant study, i am in B. so you have A B C D and things like that, recently i was told i was in B. meaning the 2nd best group in the class, meaning you dont have tutor poorer students and the teachers wont give a damn about your grades. so if you leave school without a big whoha, i doubt any teachers will remember you. for my case, ah, who is interested in knowing?

& now that i find school boring. not that i hate those subjects, on the contrary, maths, sciences :its kinda my thing, but i wish i could find myself more before getting my mind washed into doing what i am studying now.

& i thought going to school was to find who you are? take a chance in learning, understand yourself? somehow, i personally feel that school is like factory, to print out batches of students moving off to the different places, doing the same thing.

ah, if any of my teachers were to read this, off to the counsel room they will say.

when i am the only drive of this life car, i shall make sudden stops.

who am i? thats one thing i need to know.

till then...

xoxo
addie(:

*i am set on the wrong brain wavelength for now*

in which the bitch is back!

2010-06-28T15:23:00.001+08:00

tell J, the bitch is back.

ah my honeymoon has to end right. MIA for like a really long time, time to get back to where i stand, though lets just say, being in honeymoon really makes me miss home so much, ah, who am i kidding?

& ps, i am not married....

met so many friends along the way, which bug me to have twitter, telling me i will love it so much more than facebook... seriously?

i dont have a twitter AC, but i dont plan on having one yet, i mean with my facebook, i am already replacing my study book with facebook, so telling me to not to face thy book is kinda hard, though when all parties come to an end, so does hooking up on facebook.

which i must say, i dont miss it.

& i always thought, twitter is to stalk your idols and things like that? which make a total laugh out loud at A13 when someone totally think AC******* was who she said she was, but turn out to be a wannabe. opps, she or he, we never know, AC been suspended due to A13 spamming & reports. seriously, dont be naive.

****

i feel like ditching school and do whatever i want, whats the point of going to school to learn news things that help you along the way when you already know those things that you want to be. being in school to learn, find who you are, why not, skip learning and look for who you are.

yes, you might fall but you sure can stand up and walk again, dont run just yet, just walk and skip a little and let the running take place at its own pace.

anyway, A13 is AWESOME! <3 you guys, and thanks for bringing the bitch back!

hold your horses lads...

before i go on, i need to get on my 2 papers...

xoxo

addie(:

in which addie cant be bothered anymore

2010-05-27T11:29:00.000+08:00

depending on how you think, i am giving up. done trying.

just find me when u felt that you done something right.

till then bitch!

PS: dont reply me.

addie(:

in which addie was so happy!

2010-05-19T23:09:00.000+08:00

we went for drinks and love today! i was so happy. finally when i was on blooger wanted to blog before i move my ass out of the house, H was looking at it, and he asked.

H: " why are u still keeping it?"

i have no direct answer for H but just smiled and close the entire window.

i forgotten to log off.

when i am done dressing, H said this amazing line "say you will love me." god u should see H's face! bloody hell!

so our little get together LOVE was ever so amazing! we said we were from oversea and had really bad english accent! trust me its so fake that what i can think to make me say it was from harry hill! 44 days of zurich and watching E4 made me feel good in bitching! hahah

anyway so i am back and i un-sleep my laptop and there i saw was a single line blogger. single line blog. my blog. nothing below it. now i understand what H meant and i do love H so much now!

i never really want to remove it before cause some part of me still think of good stuff, and for those been with me since i am back, know that i changed a lot from the old me. and i learnt alot. things that not everyone will go through. and yeah. i been wanting to do that since i am back but i find blogging so much work and no one bother to read my blog so who cares! updating fb was already a little overrated...

but i find things so much better!

talking to jean yesterday after a whole day of suckness! it really made my day. sorry babe! i am not going this sat! no one is free and i dont want to be in a concert alone! its weird! ah guys and cuteness = awesome night! hahah

oh well, i need to meet my dream guy for now. for that one who bothers spinning lies, have fun. for now its enjoying dreams of vampires!

till then.

xoxo
love addie(:

in which addie really want a wish right now

2010-05-06T21:51:00.000+08:00

if i have a wish, a wish that i can make...

u know i will make use of it really good. what happen, happened. and i cant be bother to look back on it.

i went to read jasmine's blog and felt her, i know what she been through and i know my lesson in zurich with mic and cancer. though it totally freak out mic when i break down but its really worth it when u get all the good stuff after that.

i mean dont cry for fun! dont cry to get good things. it only happen to me cause i was dearly love by them. so dont try that on anyone else. haha but i wont ever want to do that. never again!

i been off and on. with my school work, with D, with life, with friends. i still havent reply tons of people who asked me out. the only reason i havent been out, please i am not coming out(get me?), is the fear. the fear of thoughts.

and its okay to let your mind think a little, work a little bit by thinking, slow you down a second and think. think its a self updating, your mind thinks, and it makes you grow.

i love jami, she really thought me alot! her three kids are so lucky to have her as a mum, i mean she is awesome. i am really glad to know her. and cancer.... duh! haha

i just wish i am that strong person that you both know i am, but i havent been that brave little leo for now.

xoxo
addie(:

in which addie says hi!

2010-04-22T22:51:00.000+08:00

hi! in whatever language you want. but i am typing in english...

so i am back, and its not even a week from that lovely place! i am going back there every time i going to have a holiday! haha. anyway i just love the place so much and with so many new friends over there, though mostly they love me like a kid sister cause i am much younger than them. but at least we had fun!

and i miss every cute guys there! oh that guy i see everyday at the station, damn! if only one of us would dare to start talking and not just look and smile! yeah yeah! eyes on the ball addie! i mean thats the highlight of the whole holidays and many other things which i dont find the need to type now.

so i been gone a really long time and not typing anything up here just because i chose to sit back and read some other funny blogger's blog, i seriously think, some of them are pretty nice! haha and some should get a life.

so for those who actually msg me to ask me about what the gossip is, and so sorry i really cant be bothered to reply, i mean i dont want to waste 60 cents to tell you since you should be paying to know and not the other way round...

yeah yeah, addie a bitch! seriously, me a bitch. yeah. okay, where was I?

xoxo
addie(:

in which addie and model

2010-03-30T01:52:00.000+08:00

models! urgh!!! okay listen, so i was watching FTV(fashion TV) and its like they are showing models and the only reason that they are so good looking in all type of clothes is not :

A) they are slim and tall
2) they are sick

and more reason i cant think of right now. but they totally dont have boobs! okay that might be just me but yeah... bite me. ahr crap i am not in a good mood!

the next door cute guy and his room mate is not home! i am so sad! they have been away for a really long time. guess they are learning or on some flying trip. so sad. and i am having bad mood!

bite me!!!
addie D:

in which addie breathes the air!

2010-03-29T16:14:00.000+08:00

i wanna breathes the air! (figure it out)

and i am so bored! i practically know almost all the old people around here... thats how bored i am. and plus everyone is going away for easter! and i am so bored that there is almost no one around here... i am bored.

bored! 2 more weekends and i am going home! is it good or bad that once i reached, school starts? ahr! jet lag! major jet lag!!!

anyway i better go shower and clean myself up so we can go get more food and cook for lunch!

watching one tree hill on E4 and they were talking about 4 years later, and who will still show up for the pact they made 4 years ago. i can tell you, for my case, i might not even know if the 4 of us will meet again! and if the world going to end in 2012, then thats another story! yeah.. its 10.20 now.. going out soon!

xoxo
addie(:

PS: yes jasmine! i wont! haha... and you mr, i cant believe you read my blog and label it on facebook! i will kill you, E!

in which addie and things i dont talk about

2010-03-28T22:03:00.000+08:00

i dont talk about a lot of stuff.

when you see me sitting and looking into my glass of...be it anything, i am just doing that in my mind. i dont think or play anything in my mind. its just playing the image of the glass i am looking at.

so when i just look at you like i am listening to you, and if you are so boring, i am just looking at you and picking out your flaws and everything. but i can look right into your eye but i am dying to see you crash.

anyway i am just so bored and things i dont talk about. it was on the dinner table and someone said i was too quiet and kept asking me am i okay. i will tell you that i wont be okay but dont count on it.

dont count on those gossip on me now. cause i just dont feel like typing it.

bored!!!
xoxo
addie):

in which addie and MR-shock

2010-03-28T02:04:00.000+08:00

okay this guy is freaking funny. we were at some store and he was giving out free drinks. and so i went to get a bottle then my brother wants it so i had to get two and trying to speak in german... anyway so he turned around and just went blank. i can see from his face like he was just blank. then only when i said thanks and walked away, his eyes started to come back to life. he is cute.. really cute i can say. and well, just shocking! so we went round the store to get food and stuff and he was still there so we were like paying for our things and that was when he smiled! gosh is so cute man! okay, thats it. i am cutting me into half and grow taller and then get a guy here.... haha ahr... but he did say something to me in german when i get the bottle the second time but i dont understand what he was saying... ah.. hope he dont find me rude. cause i was like seriously thinking he was just promoting the drinks. yeah... how fun! i have no idea what he said and i dont want to ask anyone what he said. god! and i cant put into the right pronounce of what he said.

yeah. i am just so slacky now. and i think my english has gone down into no where land. or rather a place where only i can understand. i stop reading english or writing english. and i think i just mis-spell writing in a card i am sent to jordyn. claps! great, this is just so great! i am like super dead for english. i will get some book from my brother and start reading it. cause its a lot to catch up and my english suck! dinner time and earth hour soon. its earth hour now, here.... haha i need to live on my laptop battery and have dinner. and my battery is dying. so yeah!

xoxo
addie(:

in which addie sees cute guy!

2010-03-26T05:24:00.000+08:00

cute guy! cute cute guy! one cute guy so far... who i am so sure we flirt a bit. even cancer thinks we did! he is cute!!! so damn cute man. but its all the eye flirt. but he is cute. okay my aim is still the cute next door! i said he is or they are student but... student of pilots! it just made me want more of him! just the one of them! but we got to meet each other more often. maybe he has a girlfriend or so. but wait... they go to school in the morning then drive home. ohhh in this red audi! having a audi car here is counted as rich. oh and they drive home and we never see them leaving the house. oh wait... please dont tell me he is gay! oh man!!!!

okay... got to send my mum to the airport. she is going home! i have my less than one month stay here. so enjoy it and also hope to see more cute cute guys! :)

fri: send mum home
sat: send Rachael home

oh well. love it went you stay near to the airport so you dont feel having to travel all the way... anyway i am so tired now. so i am typing all crap and nonsense, plus my english and german is all mixing up and german is like singlish. so its all in my mind to relocated everyword i said.

note to self: dont smell mustard... even when they write honey mustard!

oh and i know its so common to have pics on your blog but i dont think i wanna to do that. cause it will take so long to load the blog. sorry Jasmine! haha go fb to see my pics! haahah :)

in which addie thinks its so unfair!

2010-03-21T22:08:00.000+08:00

its so unfair!!

or is it just me?

skiing was awesome anyway, but then, why i dont see cute guys that are my age? all i can see are really really really old people. or adults like married or whatever but no cute teenage boys! damn! even the hotel that we stayed are filled with really really really old people! no kids just old couples! and dont get me started on some other places we went! okay the only cute guy i saw was not actually cute. he was okay, acting cool and all then he took off his sunglasses and he was cute. note that i said was, not is. so then he pulled out his cancer stick and look over to our table. i was like.... okay, you just drop from cute to eww!

okay, so i really thought no one knew that i fall in skiing was because i cant ski, its because i am too lazy! haha it is so damn freaking heavy! the boots are crazy heavy and you have to move so much and ski, and when you stop, you cant stand straight so i fell. and my brother was like dont bother to do anything cause he knows that i fall out of laziness and tiredness, even the teacher knows that. the reason is that when i fall, i can fall really nicely with position and all and i am too lazy to try to get on my feet or boots after that. so i just pose there. and the teacher, its a private teacher, he said this, adeline, you love snow dont you? i was like -.- yeah. whatever! haha

we got a private teacher to teach the 4 of us and the teacher had to call a professional skier to teach my mum cause she was kinda slow and after the break, oh we had like 5 hours of ski lesson, my mum wanted to rest so the professional skier went to teach my brother and the teacher taught me and Rachael, well.. she is my brother friend anyway, so in the end we were like so damn tired after the 5 hours of ski, had pizza and awesome red wine which i think my brother got high cause its kinds high %. and the 5 of us slept before 9pm. which was so pretty new! haha

anyway today, Micheal drove us to the place where they film the princess diaries suddenly cant rmb the place name but its the smallest country in Europe! its smaller than singapore! and we saw the castle where the prince still lives there, yup, there is still a prince that rule the country! but we cant get in and we cant get a photo of it cause it was raining so we went to some other place after that.

okay! i really love the group of uni guys living next to us. they just moved in and one of them is really hot!!! he is so damn smoking hot! he always tired to talk to me but he seems to catch me in the wrong time. but he is hot!!!!

alright... we are heading to Geneva tml and cross over to France! :) we could had been to Austria but we were lack of time as my brother needs to attend some workshop! its awesome here! i dont have to bring my passport and i can enter Germany, Liechtenstein and soon France without a passport!!!

Liechtenstein! thats the place we went where they film the princess diaries!

in which addie is enjoying life

2010-03-10T18:44:00.000+08:00

its just sucks that all the cute guys are in town and i dont go town that often! urgghhh!

yesterday went movie, 3D, alice in wonderland. awesome anyway, wish there is more 3D though. but anyway on the way to the cinema there is this awesome cute guy man! i mean seriously, we changed eye contact and smile! he is cute! anyway okay i got to move on. cute guys man! haha i am going town more when i got my keys! haha so i can see more of them. though there are some who are like staring at me on train but i was like not into him and he said HI! i was like sooo not my type! haha i guess it was the purple coat! okay, my whole out fit is like full purple! haha its negative degree now! freaking cold, you cant go out without 3 layers of clothes and that doesnt include the outer coat! oh man! i want a cute guy! but if i get in, its so going to be a fling and yeah! haha

i love it here! i wanna move here, but i would have to get my own place. maybe i should rent the place opposite my brother's house! eh... if i get like 4000chf per month to pay the rent and not counting the rest of the expenses! urgh! i get a job first and we shall see. but i got to go attend uni here! in german people! oh yeah! whatever! i am enjoying life here. people here are nice and friendly! haha so awesome!

* i just hope you die*

anyway
xoxo
we are going out again! bus ticket is like awesome for students! :D love it here!

ps: i love here!

anyway, i really am so glad that, that selfish person is like off my back. i really hope its so much better now that i am not the one trying to make friendship works! its freaking selfish. and i am happy that you get a life of shitness and bitch, i hope you die! oh wait, i just wanna let this out! alert! she got knocked up and she went abortion! yeah let it out. i got more dirt on you bitch!

in which addie thinks someone should get a life

2010-03-07T20:10:00.000+08:00

get a freaking life u ahole! i mean stop making urself sound like a little victim over some stupid life! i mean hello... who is right who is wrong, perhaps once you are in my shoe then you will know big time! i mean WTF just cause you wishes to be label a little victim over the mastermind and you chose to lie your way through every single pieces of details in the story. oh geez thanks, you wasted my fucking 4 years bitch! you i hope you got knock up big time and your bf dumps you and your freaking life died on you, and u are hopeless! i hope you got rob, rape and beaten up like there are no fucking tml! and i hope you die so much that you are so screwed up! so you make me, i am making you take fucking shit on your fucking screw up life! i think i should start telling all those personal stories you told me now. i will see how happy your freaking life can be. cause bitch! i hope you die big time! and you will have no roof above ur head! you bitch. asshole!

rmb this, LEOs dont forgive and forget! so you bite me hard, dont think i will let you off the hook! cause i wont! bitch!

in which addie made a detour

2010-02-23T23:15:00.000+08:00

detour. if i spell that right.

so after math, dont make me talk about it i wanna cry big time! so i was on the way home with den and sufyan(which i am pretty sure i spell his name wrongly). and i wanted to walk home cause i am sure i met someone whom i really dont want to meet and walk away all of it.

then i called randy for no reason, knowing that he is in exam, i left him a voicemail. then i walk home, all i said was " hi... well, have fun! then he called me like freaking 7 times! i didnt know he called, i left my phone in my bag, well, i was buying things and i know my new phone the vibration is pretty strong but still i have no idea about it. and he was like freaking out when i call him. he thought i died or what. like what i wanted to tell him was mostly girls stuff and you dont talk to a guy that. plus, i should listen to munirah's words or aisah or zy or everyone's words to get over it but i cant. like its pretty hard. they should open a group like the A&A and what i will do is go and say.

"hi, i am addie. i lost ** **** ***** over * ***. its been 3 months now...." haha anyway

so randy was on the phone like being a bitch! yeah, i said it. its was pretty sad that i had to say that but still. something for you. stop changing your name on facebook. i dont know who you are!

ohh... kenny, munirah and i should go again. cause i really need it big time!

okay i lost track, anyway i shall end here. cause my brain is making a detour!

xoxo
PS: lets see how long you can last.... lets see how happy you can be... haha you know i am quoting from you!

in which addie dont find it useful

2010-02-19T14:01:00.000+08:00

i dont find it useful to buy branded clothes at this point of age. in the world of teens, brand seems everything and but seriously, do you find it a need to show off whats under you? you dont come from a rich family with status and all. if you are from there, i get your point. but if you are NOT from there, having everything by brands, dont you think, your pocket aint that big? big enough for a hole i guess. signing on to visa and owing people tons of interest and adding on those you owe. do you think its worth?

if you are trying to fit into the world, thinking by joining the group and I to walk the town in high end clothes. but i dont enjoy those, so dont brand me this and there, cause i find you dumb doing that. i dont go for brands, i go those that made me comfortable. so if you see me in some, to your world, brand-less clothes, forgive me for trying to be real. you are not from gossip girl. so dont dress like them and finding money from everyone around you to get your hot pink jacket. cause even you said the brand, you can say where is it from, who design it, in what year did it come out.... etc. those fashion talks. so if you see my rolling my eyes when you wore your Gucci to a street cafe, i just made my point.

be real, you will end up selling them to repay those debts.

a little something from me, i dont be friends with you for what you wear, i be friend with you for your personalities.

till then
xoxo

PS: repacking. wanna join?

in which addie needs to relook at those white

2010-02-17T15:44:00.000+08:00

i really am not look forward to meeting my brother. though i really miss him and i am happy that he is happy but i still dont feel like meeting him. i just dont want to go into a school, take some test to define if you can study there. i want to relax and i want not to think about all those.

i love taking german. its not something i will have second thoughts again. but its getting closer. do i really want to move over in 2 years time? i never really asked myself that question. what do i really want to do? i cant live on my passion because i dont have the simple basic. i do have the overall. but to make it, i cant pass. i will have to chop myself into half before i can get into the center to be... simply me. not saying that i cant now, i can. but the chances as compare to as i am half, the me now had only... 15% and the half of me... 50% . you see the percent.

and to live on what i am learning now? i am dying to make ends meet. and the worst it, they are bringing in a new subject, there are too many on my plates now. i cant even take the time to think about it.

and i cant fail.

i cant fail, because everyone is looking at me. i am dragging my mother, brother and the other side of me in this ugly world. and i cant fail.

i cant quit either. i have to walk down even if there is like a zillion wounds on me. i cant quit.

i grown into this person where i cant see myself fail. its like breathing underwater and you know that you cant but there is this moment, sparks that made you want to try it. and when you did, water rushes into your nose and your brain into a state of... pain

pain, define that to me. i felt nothing with a stab wound in me.

2 years, 2 years, i will get a new phone and move my whole room to there. am i even ready?

let me ask me this, are you ready? i can tell you now, i dont feel like i am. in 2years time, so you can take your time to think? i am sorry i cant. i just dont feel like.

stop asking me to walk around and do those tiny little things you wish to do now. eg: run in sun, cause you will miss it. i wont. i am not dying. so i wont.

i am sorry. but i really dont want to. i would rather kill myself now and let someone stab me.

i am sorry...

well, on the other side, i got a new phone! LG crystal. its a awesome phone. so much awesome. haha. i cant tell you anything but its so so so freaking awesome then my that old phone. cause this phone is.. awesome. no tiny details for now. i need to rush to some place now.

till then...
xoxo
addie.

PS: life fails you or you fail life?

in which addie knows the fact

2010-02-10T19:01:00.000+08:00

this lie where you carry, on who you define you as.

why do you have to follow what everyone is doing? its like in a jam, where cars are line up back to back moving slowly towards the same direction. why is it wrong to be different? who define what is wrong and what is right?

why are u always hiding in that shadow of yours? when will you move on to be like someone you know you could had won a million of hearts with that different-ness of yours? dont you feel sad every single minute, in that reflect of yours? do you feel like you are wearing a mask over and over and over and that deep naked flesh of yours is slowly fading?

screw human's thinking.

in which addie is thinking another way out

2010-02-09T09:25:00.000+08:00

defining who what where and why. it wasnt easy. for me at least. but i found a way.

who: the human
what: the happening
where: the place
why: ask the human.

& i know its wasnt logic but i just simply being an Ahole at the time being. oh yes and i finally chat with CANCER!which is something i havent done in a while.

so he said. that break i am going over there, wasnt a rest well holiday. more likely to study german over there for EVERYDAY! which is killing me. and helloo.. lesson starts at 8am and talk about jet lag people!! D: haha

but it wasnt of all sudden great at the point when i care about me not able to speak german.

now waiting for my turn to do some presentation on some crapy C++ computer crap.. and i thank those who are interested in it.

lastly: i suddenly think that life on the other side wasnt that bad afterall. being there really let me see how great the world on the OTHER end is like...

xoxo

PS: just let me look good in the new fringe i am cutting on wednesday. & i dying want a role!

in which addie says hey!!

2010-02-07T22:19:00.000+08:00

i am suppose to watch some show now. on telly. but i got started on something else.
ah... so damn sad!! i miss the whole show. its something at world's end. some jack sprrow or whatever it is. no idea the show name! haha

finally after like so long of rushing, i finally can breathe a little. changing the blog skin to the old one was hell man. i lost all the links and i got to check back one by one.

anyway i am saving up to get me a new camera so i can shoot like a mad women in zurich! rachel is going so it will be fun i guess! though i really dont know her much.. but she is caner's friend so.. anyway no harm right.. haha

anyway.. j got a crushie and she wants to tell him.. wish you all the best j!

talking to grandma half way and she went offline. :( sad.. wanting to ask her more things but when she is online, i am doing the blog and when she is not online, i want to talk to her. & if u see this, text me! haaha

ohh lala. i got to say. today was the best when i can really look at the computer and do nothing. just surfing whatever i want and not projects, meetings, all crap!!

oh nothing much now. just get a bath. and watch the end of the show and well thats all.. ahah

sadly to say, i do miss you. but i wont and i dont want to go back. stupid stupid addie, why are u thinking about *** now? :(

anyway... saving on so much!

xoxo

PS: a camera... oh a camera! :)

in which addie should be getting sleep

2010-02-04T01:32:00.000+08:00

i am not going to study material science anymore. this is killing me.. i should get some sleep...

just blog hop to "kill" my mind for a while. though i know i havent been updating for like a zillion years ago! anyway but then i still feel sleepy. so i have no idea what i am typing and i guess i wont know. cause i wont be reading it myself anyway.

me need sleep.

so i am cranky

tata!
PS: me need life and life needs me! oh well...

in which addie and the new year

2010-01-03T12:56:00.000+08:00

HELLO 2010! or some what THE new year!

well. i am going to change something to the blog. cause i think there are just a few changes need to be made. my blog skin is damn Ahole. the stupid pic wont load. and i love it so much. the part where gossip girl, lonely boy and S, is on the top pic and its pretty awesome. and i really love the show!

plus who can it define as a pure friendship or even call each other friend when the other party is so self-centered and all. i mean... pls, if u ever think you can settle a home without any REAL friends then by all means, go ahead. if anything were to happen and u dont have a shoulder to cry on. too bad, and u can say, u can hold it all, cause that what you been doing since young, then alright, who cares!

anyway, i am so over it. plus, some friends come and go, some stay & they build a family around you. cause those are what you call true friends! they care about you, and you care about them, not only one person does all the work and the other, well... sit and hold it all.

enough of that... oh my! i am telling you, i really love hanging out with munirah and kenny that day! its so pretty awesome! plus plus... good news! i passed my freaking drama exam!!!! haha. so damn happy!

anyway i am off to enjoy my last day of freedom before school starts!

tata

xoxo

PS: i am so loving the new lizard tattoo! :D

in which addie is so glad.

2009-12-28T11:12:00.000+08:00

phasing time is over. like big time over! i am so glad now. the world is so much brighter!

PS: who need a friend like u who only thinks about yourself. the "ME this, Me that.." ugh. so O V E R. suck it bitch!

in which addie was like "what the hell did i do the past 3 days?"

2009-12-14T10:58:00.000+08:00

okay so on firday, i went out with jami and jenna. wanted to catch the princess and the frog or anything else, but the only rated 13 movie was that and planet 51 which jenna didnt want to watch. so in the end, we only could have the frog movie but it was so freaking sold out. and the rest of the movie, she couldnt enter. and the only other one was new moon, which i watched before. so jami said we should just go for a nice dinner and send me home after that, and it was my idea to ask them to watch new moon without me, afterall i caught that before!

so we went to American Club for dinner and seriously...(nevermind)

so thats my friday...

sat. HOME ALONE... No parents till sunday. been slacking around, printing notes, reading them then watch movie and eat my life away. that what i do on sat also. just go on and watch star movie over and over. and they showed twilight. which i told myself not to watch cause its common test this week and yeah it did not happen.

so i better go do some of my math and go for the exam at 2pm. wish me luck! :D

PS: its the freaking week man! URGH!

in which addie is sorry

2009-12-04T20:48:00.000+08:00

i am so sorry i am not who you want me to turn out to be
i am so sorry that i wasnt that smart enough
i am so sorry that i was this big
i am so sorry that i wasnt pick
i am so sorry that i am so sorry

dont mind me. i am as the normal way again.
urgh! in anyways

on the bright side. i went out with my grandmother! no, not my real grandmother, although that will be creepy but anyway, we caught new moon! in such terms,

i went in as a vampire fan and out came a werewolf fan. i mean the werewolf, wolf, as in the animal not the human. though jacbo is really hot with all the abs and all but the wolf is so damn... i really want to hug it man! sorry i got a soft spot for animal! haha :P

anyway, okay i am super up straight jealous! urgh! haha...

PS: i think it really cool that it happen :)

in which addie is fine

2009-11-29T00:42:00.001+08:00

I am fine. thanks for asking! :D

its a brush, no problem. i am all well.

PS: show's over! haha

in which addie wants to know

2009-11-28T23:05:00.000+08:00

if your best friend was on the phone with his/her girlfriend/boyfriend for the whole 2 hours without looking at you or avoid you. what do u do?

just pick ur own answer.

PS: collecting data. was a past tense on friend. :D

yes, i am meaner when i want to be mean.:P

in which addie had move on

2009-11-28T21:32:00.000+08:00

after a really sad email. and i realize how someone can really change you and talking to aisah. i felt much better, there is no use lying in a friendship that i once called best friend. perhaps, i see that i need one friend to call best friend while the others called good friend.

and i saw something today. they were right. when u are at your worst, down and all. someone who care about you will bring you back up. i dont see that, because i had my one eye glued on that nice word : best friend forever.

what does it really means? the person dont seems to understand and so do i. and why lie to keep it on? i felt so much better.

screw it? screw wasting time. cause i have more than one. i have tons who i feel much better. its all the sun glass again.

and i see the world again, or the person once again. screw the fun time. screw on so many level. i am love! not by you. cause ur mind is fucking close. go screw time with ur forever and that other person. dude, seriously, i know there is this other person who replace me. sad case i shall say, deep down, screw you bitch!

cause only by listening i truly gain a new lesson. some what so much important then ever. lets see in life, i will be there, as an contact on ur list. and when u feel no one to seek to, i am there. for now, screw you!

PS: hey! i got in! celebrate!

in which addie and her hard disc

2009-11-27T18:11:00.001+08:00

finally! i got my hard disc and got the time to blog a bit.

saw my sec school form teacher. so happy to see her, in fact, she called me. totally didnt see her at all... haha

anyway so where did i last end?

i cut my hair short
i got lots of new clothes
i got a lots of homeworks too.

i got a hard disc.

i felt so stupid today.

look, i wanted to have fun today, and someone dont seems to understand the right time,i mean yeah u can call and chat over the phone and blah and things like that. but hello, do you have to do it for the whole bloody damn 2 hours? like i wasnt even there? and btw, i was trying to get us out of that place. and u just go on and on and on and on with ur phone, i wanted to asked, if we go buy the stuff to bake now or eat our dinner and... but then i changed my mind. and we walked out of the place(alive), later at the station, i said okay thats it if the train is here and she hangs up, i will tell her the plan, but no, even the train was underground, out of a sudden, her phone can work underground, you dont even talk to me that long on a phone, always when u happen to be underground, it got cut off. and hello like i am invisible! like i was too small to notice? i plug the mp3 into my ears then i gave up the idea of even talking. and on the whole bus ride, still talking thats like 30 mins and okay nevermind, when we alright, still talking. and you freaking dont bother to ask where we are, did it cross ur mind that i took the wrong bus? i wanted to aboard the bus so u were left behind, i wanted so badly to let you walk away! i wanted we to get lost, or the matter, you to be lost. i dont want you to be there.

and i was so freaking glad that the bus came and i got on, and i thought, you would follow, but no, so i text you, and guess what a bloody :) appear! i was like wtf, like you think you done nothing wrong at all. bloody hell. i totally give up, love my last line. " when you want to have fun and you are boyfriend free for once, call me." i mean i dont mind him calling you but hello, at least tell him that you were with someone and we are planning to go out and blah and things like that. i mean i can tell by your reply, you are hanging on the phone so bloody badly. wtf! urgh!!!

thats it, i guess it really ends tonight.

PS: open casting, interested?

urgh!

in which addie is rather buzy

2009-10-28T22:05:00.000+08:00

i promise i will update more on friday, and more and more! i promise.

i promise so many things

so i shall do them now

PS:squirrel and friday and sunday! :D

:D

in which addie is back!

2009-10-23T10:42:00.000+08:00

okay its almost a week that i am back. but i am just too lazy to blog! haha anyway i changed my name to adeline aka addie. maybe changing again soon. the reason why, its because someone went to google my name and can find my blog! soon also changing my facebook name! i dont really want anyone to know where is my blog or facebook. i want to be ungoogleable. is that even a word?

anyway its a long story. maybe next time i would. plus, i am not that seeking attention anyway! seriously, do you have to shout my name right across the streets? you think i am deaf or blind? i can see you. i smiled at you, what more do you want? oh god!

anyway i am off to meet jami before school. soon soon, anyway good news! i am going to zurich in march, during my holiday! thats a maybe going!

german lesson 101.
i need tuition,big time!

PS: squirrel said, leave the hell out of me alone!

in which addie is in total love with Glee

2009-10-11T16:28:00.000+08:00

gLee! i know. how awesome man! haha i totally love the show! i cant tell u how much i love it! and vampires diaries! glee just rocks! i love all the songs!

and yes i pack my luggage! haha anyway i am so tired and the noise of the weddings! 3 of them are killing me! i need sleep! or i can that pill on glee! haha i am just joking!

going back to where i used to work, but this time i am not working. its just awesome! i need sleep and love sleep!

oh oh...

why i dont have glee club in school?

PS: squirrel with gLee on the head! :)

in which addie havent pack

2009-10-11T09:44:00.000+08:00

okay` i havent pack my luggage! and i slept for less than 5 hours from yesterday to today! and i am totally stuck on vampires! should i bring books to shanghai? its only 5 days, thats what mae said. anyway i brought a new purple converse...

freaking awesome! i know. totally worth it. though i got 2nd thoughts after buying it. okay i think i am going to pack now!

WHAT ARE YOU?

i love the vampire! haha

PS: squirrel and sleepless night!

in which addie had pass!

2009-10-09T20:05:00.000+08:00

so today is the real test day and i passed! how awesome!

and also meet jami for lunch and movie! oh i enjoyed myself today! anyway i think i need to go pack my luggage now! till then

PS: squirrel caught (500) days with summer.

in which addie got this

2009-10-08T00:41:00.000+08:00

read that:

I HATE YOU!

back to square one. geez thanks. this got to go down the record for not fighting for 2 years and four months! no we are back to square one.

PS: squirrel is pissed

in which addie done her trial one!

2009-10-07T17:23:00.000+08:00

trial one completed! how awesome! i mean its seriously so great. the rest of the room was like all adults! felt so weird! i cant wait to get over and done with. i will have my trial 2 and then test! and i can really enjoy my life packing my luggage now!

dinner with ziying was push to a later time. and i have no idea who is she planning to have the dinner with. so at least i can read my test before my test.

oh oh the damn trial is like freaking freak. i need to like not have a rebel mind to take the test and i hope i can pass! the first paper i did was fail! and i was like OMG. dead meat. hopefully when i redo the 6 papers again, i can pass! oh well. i need to go off to meet the rest now.

update soon! :)

PS: squirrel and the big red word FAIL for the 1st 2 papers :'(

in which addie is pack from now to sat!

2009-10-06T19:01:00.000+08:00

okay not now. but then take a look at my plan:

Wed: trial test 1, 2 hrs and later dinner with jan, randy, dave and who?
Thu: trial test 2, 2 hrs and later dinner with ziying and who?
Fri: test day for 1 hrs and later meeting with jami
Sat: meeting with mae
Sun: pack luggage and sleep
Mon: airport! haha

lol. i am not going away and not coming back forever! haha ziying wanted to meet me on friday but i already agreed meeting jami. so haha. anyway i hope on sun i will have time to pack. i havent look at my trial test and test and also pack. but again, who cares about packing now. more on the test! yeah. hope i pass and i can show it to cancer! you wait for the good news, brother!

anyway just so you know. i need to look at the book now. okay later, after the tv show. wait. i got show from 9pm to 12am later. okay better read now. or i die!

haha

PS: its a pretty busy week! said squirrel to leo haha

in which addie had something on her mind

2009-10-05T21:54:00.000+08:00

there is something on my mind. i just cant think what was it. 5 of oct. i been thinking for the past few days and i cant think whats so important about it. omg! i am like super dead if its anything important. alright i think i will go watch some telly, maybe they can hint me.

i just went for meeting and i dont feel the heat of going oversea. yes, i got to admit just a bit when i was back home and my dad got my mum's luggage out. mine was too heavy. the empty luggage itself was like 3 to 5 kg. thats like too much. and i cant think what i must bring and all. so i just dump 2 pair of jeans in my mum's, now my, luggage. some what its smaller and lighter. i just hope i can fit all my stuff down. and i have no idea whats will i bring.

seriously what the big idea on 5 of oct. anyone knows? please tag me. thanks. and dont spam my blog when i am gone. i think no one will haha.

seriously? i cant think of anything now.

PS: squirrel and stone

in which addie could be the one leaving

2009-10-04T22:54:00.001+08:00

i could be the one leaving today. not alone but with cancer. 'cause he is flying off to zurich today. like now, okay not now. but soon at 1.10am and i will have to see him leave. saying goodbye, really not that easy as you think it is. and even though i know he is going to come home the first week of dec. which i am counting down now.

and i still... anyway. i was at the airport, and i just reached home. his friends are there so we just leave. afterall we had dinner and all with him so... his friends can have him. and i already start to miss him.

gosh. i dont want to cry man. i cant now. i got one whole full week of stuff to do. i have:

monday : meeting for shanghai trip(12 to 16)
wed: 2 hrs in the afternoon for trial test
thu: 2 hrs in the afternoon for trial test
fri : 1 hr of test.
sat: shopping with mae!
sun: i have no idea!
monday(12): early morning. airport!

so you can see, i only have tue to think everything, and think i could meet milton in between... i guess i have to push again. gosh. it sucks man!

okay, this is official! if you call me, you would have to miss call me once then i will know. 'cause i think my stupid phone wasnt working well and the stupid ring tone is so damn soft! i know! its the max on my phone. and its still soft like a soft.

gosh... oh well...

oh oh, cancer got me a hot, lime green mp3 player! its complex man. there is no screen just those you put to your ears and all. thats it. hahaha. i am trying to figure out too. oh anyway, i think den had one too. got to check with him.

PS: squirrel and a new mp3 player

in which addie cant sleep

2009-10-03T02:40:00.000+08:00

okay, this got to end. its 2.40am and i cant sleep. its not even freaking jet lack! i havent travel oversea yet. its on the 12. and its the 3rd and i am so freaking awake. my brain is crashing and my eyes wont close up! i seriously want to super and double glue my eye's lids!

and no one is online, those that can chat to. most of them are "away" and take forever to reply 'cause they are away. i am so tired of trying to make myself tired! and i am not at all tired!

okay. move along... and i have having a brain malfunction. i just want to sleep! save me!

PS: need sleep, squirrel!

in which addie thinks today is both a good and bad night

2009-09-29T12:10:00.000+08:00

that tonight going to be a good night
that tonight going to be a bad night

good night:
cancer is flying off and its a new start for him in a far far away land called zurich, in which he is hoping i would join him. so if i wasnt in nms i would most likely joining him or somewhat like this. he is the only person who understand where i stand and what i want. my passion and all. who i really want to be. he be there for me and so will i. so this is a happy thing for him.

bad night:
i will miss him. though i wish him well. but you know the miss and all. those good times and bad. i want him to be there with me. but also at the same time i wish him well. its a mixed feelings anyway. i love him!

anyway who cares? my mind is finally more relax a few and got to enjoy every moments i have. :)

yes,i got VIP for F1 rocks! its pretty last minute thing! ahr! anyway, its nothing too. haha so jan, dont be jealous, your time will come! :D

PS:squirrel and broken heart.

in which addie was at F1 rocks with VIP pass! :D

2009-09-27T19:30:00.000+08:00

yes sat F1 rocks and also VIP pass!

& yes, black eyed peas sang i gotta feeling! and i totally love it man!

before i was there with my brother and patterson family, i was over their place and kinda them teaching me to drink. haha. think the average american family. i had a great time there. Jardyn did make up for me and also helped by my brother and it was simply just awesome.

when black eyed peas were singing, we didnt get the VIP passes just yet, so we were so darn close to the stage, and its like i swear that my right ear was temp deaf and later when waiting for beyonce to arrive at 12am, we went to grab a drink and thats why jami called us to collect the VIP passes. and its like searching the way to Johnnie walker bar yeah that where we hang around till the whole thing was over. and though beyonce look really small. cause we were at the back of the hill, where the building is, thats the VIP place, and its freaking awesome anyway. though i can say, not a big fan of beyonce and i seriously never hear her song before and yesterday was the very first time. haha. but i like it very much. so thanks so much for the awesome night.

anyway just to say:

F1 rocks really rocks! caught Black Eyed Peas and Beyonce! B.E.P. sang 'I gotta feeling'! woohoo!!! many thanks to my dearest brother and Patterson family for this wonderfull & awesome Saturday night! :D love ya!(:

haha. it ended well. it really did. whatever it is, the fact that you are my brother, never change. i love you very much, and it make me love you even more. (:

PS: "there is just so many things on my mind right now." said squirrel.

in which addie doesnt sound like Ross in FRIENDS

2009-09-23T12:45:00.000+08:00

i so dont sound like ROSS in FRIENDS!

ross, the guy? tall? Monica's brother, some what till season 2, he and Rachel together? go figure out yourself!

anyway i so dont sound like him, okay! so dont! come on. -.-

here's what she said on msn this wee morning.

*just to change the name on msn, her freaking long name.

jan: come on, tell me! what terms? who sign on you?

me: .... :P for me to know and for you to find out.

jan: haha. i rob your room i will know already.

me: no no, you cant do that. you see

jan: see what? see you smile non stop?

me: no no, why would i smile non stop? random!

jan: you no no one more time. i no no you

me: what?

jan: haha you know what, your no no sound like ross's no no

me: ross? who? i dont know a ross! haha what? your new boyfriend?

me: good, never tell me. :@

jan: lol, ross! from friends.

me: haha. oh that! haha lol random i dont sound like ross!

jan: you do, i read ur blog. no no, sound like him! haha

me: random! lamo! how on earth i will sound like him?

jan: rmb on monday's night? you came then you "hi" like damn depressed

me: cause i am depressed!

jan: ya right. then its like ross's hi.

okay, to sum up. she just think i sound freaking like ross now! haha right. and the on going facebook and twitter war with the both of us. i mean. who cares, i just got hook on facebook because of aizhen and den! the constantly playing in lecture! haha so now i am playing the games, its better then those an hour game!

on and on the brighter note, i lose ONE KG. a small step. but hello, at least the chocolate its not to blame! haha.

so one kg down and 22kg to go. hello LIFE, i am one step closer to you and your stupid set! haha :P

PS: squirrel cursing works!

in which addie and lossing weight

2009-09-23T00:10:00.000+08:00

alrightie! here's my list of things to do before dec!

that i will lose 50 pounds(23kg) by dec the first week. so wish me luck! its a thing i have to do before dec. not going to tell you why for now, but be shocking! cause i know, this 50 is gone, there come my LIFE! haha not telling you whats that. anyway i should had lose that like months ago, but i was too lazy to even move my head. and plus, the terms aint up yet, so who cares and now it is out, here i go! go pray that i am going to lose all of those. i had too, i really have no choice!

relax! i am a big girl. yes i am fat, no seriously i am huge! i am not like those skinny people who constantly saying they are fat. i am seriously fat, overweight fat, huge fat! so yes its healthy to lose weight! and its a term i have to do now to meet ends need!

gosh, you know the 5 days holidays i am going to during oct, i hope the hotel i am staying do have a gym. so i can carry out my plans too. seriously why am i cursing myself to have eating disorder now? damn! but i hope i have them now, till dec! when everything is over!

its not the first day i am on this. its like my erm, about a week now i am on it. i dont really see any effects, maybe i ate the chocolate just now! damn, i know, trying to control! i am like a vampire who is trying not to have human blood, but i cant do that, its beyond my instinct. so i have to learn to control.

guess whats on the terms? i have to sleep early too. drink more water and not to spend too much time on the computer! seriously, i think i spend too less time on my computer. i mean so what i am addicted to watching movies and shows or playing games? i am a teen and teens need that. so i am doing it. but dang, they are going to take my computer away if i dont follow the terms, what shit hole is that?

anyway i have to follow. so now i have to sleep before 12am. which means i just broke one term. now is 12.20am and i have no intention to sleep at all! great! sleeping counts losing weight? whatever??!!?? and i am going to break another rule today(the fact that its 12am) i going to a birthday party, not mine(what a shame). but then i have to have a cake, a small one i think! i will control

so before i got caught now, no no, i am not in some locked up room with all exercising thingy. just my house, the one where i live in. so i still live normally but just that i sign the terms and have to follow it.

i will tell you what terms till dec is here! and after the 50 pounds, say hello to LIFE!

so wish me luck and stay with me! to LIFE i come!!

:)

PS : squirrel is my soul that is eating!

in which addie and nms bbq!

2009-09-19T01:10:00.001+08:00

okay today bbq was awesome man! haha i had like so much much fun! haha

anyway i cant wait for other event like this. haha i cant wait for the photos too. cos i like the lightsticks i bought! haha they were so awesome in the dark! and the food and the people and yes, everything! haha and night cycling too!

i just love today bbq! cant wait for photos!

PS: double burnt squirrel!

in which addie and songwriting

2009-09-16T20:38:00.000+08:00

songwriting, oh who said it is easy?

okay, so i got this perfect song in my head, that i was singing to myself over and over, though it was different lyrics but it sound equal nice. and just when i wanted to sit down to write down, its like so totally different! omg! i cant write, i write nothing out. and even if i could, the melody is like all over the place. sad case people!

you would support me if i write and sing one, yeah? haha

PS: squirrel writing a song!

in which addie is burn!

2009-09-16T00:13:00.000+08:00

okay great! burn and red! i hate going in the sun! what's with sun block? it will never let u totally have no sunburn! ahr!

anyway, i found someone else with the complete full season of friends! ahh awesome eh! i wonder should i borrow from him or cancer! hmm i wonder. but cancer's dvd = mine. haha

anyway i had lots of fun today, despite the 8:2, boys : girls! haha yep! 8 boys and 2 girls. cool, eh! haha had lots of crap today, mostly burn and swearing why the sun sucks so much, but its fun! haha i love today! awesome day, haha

anyway i am dead beat, and i have to sort up the photos and also update the blog! haha turtle did a great job at it! haha anyway...

PS: burn squirrel!

in which addie and friends

2009-09-14T20:39:00.000+08:00

haha yes friends! the show, that end at season 10! yes i am glued to it.

hahha i just love the cast! if they are my friends. hahah the humor and all. hahah but its a show! not in real life, i guess! but i might be so wrong!

anyway tml i going to have a day in the sun, sand and fun with the home stay club people! hopefully i will have fun, despite i have no idea who is going. but come on, i bet i will. we will.

oh & my brother got friends dvd over at zurich! and i am so jealous! he just wont bring it back for it. he said it will take up half of his suitcase! for real? hhaha went movie with him yesterday and its like he kept on saying last 2 weeks! last 2 weeks before he flying off! darn how sad man! and next year and all? gosh! i feel like crying now.

on the other note, i been slacking off now. yes, its off my plan! i will do that on wed! i promise! hahah

PS: prepping sunburn for squirrel!

in which addie had a nice and slack day

2009-09-10T21:24:00.000+08:00

okay. after what the final wave of drama exam is over! seriously i already knew how its going to end and start. and i did my best, whatever ever the outcome is, i really dont want to think about it.

okay back to my life. havent been updating the blog for almost a month! okay life was as the same, who bother reading? i am not those "HIP wanna be" who constantly seeking attention. constantly CONSTANTLY!! ahr. seriously dont bother to turn up, even if u did, you just make everyone there invisible and use your "charm" towards the teacher which seriously i see a very very very sad and pathetic person. word of advice: grow up! get a freaking life. because i know behind those make-ups is this person i USED to know. this person whom without those are much real... much real. okay... why do i bother? oh wait, i find it pathetic man!

aright! haha i enjoy walk. i really do, well that was before a nail went up my feet. okay its not that bad! its like your feet, and a nail behind it. so its like a feet nail! haha alright i am out of words! anyway its that. but, thankfully it was after the wonderful meal i had and the walk, which was supposed to walk back, all the way to mae's house! but it was caught by a nail! okay, who ever speaks like that? anyway...

okay now i seriously thinks miss mc have a picture of Chekhov up her bedroom and those freaking fans where she have all the books chekhov ever written! oh oh and like have this fan website where she is the creater and the only entu fan(that i know so far) of him. how in the world she is so in love with chekhov???????????? oh anyway if u you are wondering who, its chekhov! MAT was famous because of his 4 major plays! anyway i have to be a "one-night" fan of chekhov just to please miss mc! yes!! okay even what i read on google was no match to miss mc. she like a walking chekhov zombie! hmm...

note to self: nickname for miss mc! hahah McChekhov? haha LOL

anyway McChekhov said i was charming? wow, what the hell does she means? is that good or bad? why i feel like it is bad? oh man.... what does she means:" anyway, i have a nice chat with you, you are a very charming girl." and a smile after that. a very unfriendly McChekhov who gave me more than a smile within that one hour! and not forgetting the freaking knife who i really thought she is going to kill me with it. ahah mae was downstairs and McChekhov held the knife and said without any (yes! any) expression :" i am going to go up there to scare the student(s)." or something like that. but it was with no expression. oh and there's a "haha" in it too. freaking,eh.

anyway. just to know that my phone bills are like reaching the roof or its already there! so if i dont pick up or sms u back, its really means that i really cant! i am so broke now that i am too lazy to find a job! yes! anyway its time for me to rest. rest before i go oversea!

anyway i like yesterday! after the exam, i mean. the walk, ice-cream, pizza hut, walk, and yes! the nail, and the bus(where i really thought i lost my card!), and the walk of spooky playground!(thanks for the "ghost story") and the healing of my wound, oh and the random talks and card games and pvz! oh mae! thanks man! and well, can i just say dont go America? haha my very best friend! thank once again!

turtle to turtle:"hey pal, when we reach mid-life, we turn and look back at what we been through, i just want to say, thanks for being there!" oh, yes, baby turtle is call chocolate! i dont care! :P

hahah! life is blessed with friend like mae! oh and i am glued to friends! haha oh yeah! haha now i am only at season one! there is like nine other season to catch! a bit late, but... oh well! haha

PS: ever seen a dead squirrel?

in which addie said start of exam

2009-08-13T10:33:00.000+08:00

officially today is common test 2 for chem which is like the last paper for chem which i am so happy because i hate organic chem and all the damn LiAlH4 crap! and then i have to mug for bio on friday, which also happen to be the last paper! woohoo!

and then mug for drama which i am super duper screwed and its like dang, i dont care! going to update everything from the last post to today before heading off to meet the triplets! well, nothing much actually.

the fact that grandma was gone on 1 aug and her cremation was on 5 aug, which was my birthday and i cant celebrate it. which is i dont know, she been in and out of icu and i had been rushing for exams to icu then i got sick the whole week then later when we thinking of going to see her, she left us. its a relief for her, and i thank her for being a part of my life. though most of the time i can think of her was at the old house where she would take her wallet out and gave us money to.... buy ice-cream? or new year time to play blackjack with the cousins and all. and i miss her.

and i would like to thank the whole class. or maybe just aizhen, qiu, lovell and yeah, dumb dumb den. haha. they know i wasnt going to come on the 5 which i told them on the night of the 3 because someone ask. and they got the last minute preparation to get the cake on the 4 and gave me a surprise on the 4. haha. cool eh. and the lies that they told me, for example, going to toilet to crap from the start of math to end of math and so happen that i believe. fighting eh? haha yeah. and the sudden cake and all. afterall woo. what a surprise! nah, if u guys last minute preparation was this awesome, i cant think what will it look like on the real day, when you guys said there is plans.

and to thank cancer for the dinner on the 5 with awesome crystal jade and canele triple choc cheesecake and dinner with such a short notice at town. haha! woo... yeah. because i really thought i cant have my birthday this year.

and also the random lots of messages and asking out for dinner. which i happen to owe a whole list of people!

yes, we triplets are going to shanghai, never been there before, hope its nice. and whats more when the 3 of us are going together in oct? hahah

and of course the random update is just simply random, i am going back to read my notes and finally update on the 090909 after my dumb snd exam! haha plus plus, the finally fight. and just A aint going to be enough for me!

:D

PS: squirrel needs a good coffee for those sleep i lost.

in which addie is down with flu

2009-07-21T22:34:00.000+08:00

yeah. its been a long time since i last update my blog and i did said i am going to blog after my common tests. well i think it went well thought. got mostly A and B (claps pls) though epc is a unknown but i can say, its a D if there is no changes to it. plus its not the finally marks but hell yeah i am going to better for the final exam for the sem.

grandama went to ICU right after my day 4 paper and i have to mug my epc in the hospital. which nothing gets into my mind. she gave us a scare. the doctor said half of her brain was gone, and her heart wasnt pumping to her other organs and all of us got the damn hard night when the doctor said the next 24 hours is critic. and then i didnt get enough sleep for the next day paper. 1 week he said. 1 week to see her. and i thought at that time she really got that one week and later on friday afternoon. she woke up. her eye open for a while and she just kept on looking at me. some how i felt bad. because my memories with her in only when i was young, in her old house and when she said she dream that i became a doctor and of all the cousins she dream about me. and gave me money to play with my cousins and if they came and take my coins she will scold them and take it back from them and pass to me again. not to forget those small notes she gave me and my brother when we are about to leave her house. so i cried. i mean. i dont like her. but i dont hate her. i just dont want her to die. and later the weekends was camping in the visitor's lounge and when i got back on monday. she can talk but her heart rate was irregular but she can talk. though i had nothing to talk to her. and no one was there. i just kept repeating the same words over and over. now that she is feeling better. i felt better too.

and yes so i havent been updating for a while. i did once said i dont want to be on facebook. but afterall now i am in again. playing the games. just the games and later when i beat all my friends i am going to quit again. or maybe not. till when i am bored with it. which i am starting to feel a bit though haha.

now i am down with flu and slight fever and must be den who gave me that! alright. i need to take my meds and BIATHLON on sat was a awesome! haha i did 400m of swim with after 50m i got leg craps and i was so close to give up but i pull through the whole 400m or the rest of the 350m and aizhen was kind enough to wait for me. haha. i love that day. NX411 t-rexy! haha and den ran pretty fast too! i wasnt got of the shower and he is done with 4km haha! boys will be boys and pepper lunch after that. how awesome! haha

i going to take my meds now. update later. i will be going back to the doctor again.

PS: squirrel wants another BIATHLON

in which addie... pork ribs// twin yolk egg

2009-07-06T20:08:00.000+08:00

pork ribs and twin yolk egg.

got my math paper done today, 4 more to go. which is why i rather blog it than write it.

anyway, mum got the day off and so i got to try the pork ribs for lunch and after that for dinner i wanted to make mirco-egg for side dish and i got a twin yolk egg! awesome! haha so damn lucky. i only always see my mum craking a twin egg but no me. and i did it today. yeah!

i shall blog till here. going to read my chem! ohh...

PS: squirrel and pork ribs!

in which addie and her extra week

2009-07-03T23:18:00.000+08:00

extra week = being in hell, wait i am already in hell.

had to wake up like super early for some quiz online and my damn internet connection kept getting bad GPS. and its like the whole damn time i am feeling so tired. asking me on the quiz, size of an A4, i went to google, though the answer is in the book which is staring right back at me.

and i am using "love song" as my ring tone(dont even think of going there) and i went to try to start my mum's car. okay, so what if the car owner beside me was getting into the car? she thought i am going to drive it and gave me that look. so i just simply start the car, blow the engine and stare back at her. thats what you get from me when i have less than 5 hours of sleep and google my test. and she stares right back at me. haha. but nothing happen, she just drove off. and in my mind i was planing a war! haha.

oh and on the radio it was playing "love song" and i just took my phone out and just cant figure out why it is playing till my mum came along and told me it was the radio. yup, lack of sleep no coffee equal brain malfunction haha.

and yeah, the whole week of e-crap had finally over and i get to walk away with not doing 2 task, bio and phy. come on, i cant even understand whats on bio. something something with something to get the DNA of protein and something to draw, sounds like drawing red, blue and white on the protein fiber. and i just skip it. oh oh, my crappy speech, its finally done! woo! i am so happy though its like 99% of rubbish and the only real fact is that 1% which is my name. :). hey, i got to take credit from that. its something real and fact in the whole speech.

dont ask me about my feet, its still not healing, the fact when it heal, it will tear, i move too much. its been a week. yup and last week i was blogging about it. haha! and yes i baked cookies for the last day of kidz! sad... but yeah. at least i wont have to see them anymore. haha...

and this is more like a weekly post, i will try to write more i hope. haha & there's no drama and its been officially a month since i last touch it. after the exams, i promise...

and yes, how in the world you get GPA 4.0? and i dont know. things are happening too fast. i just want to slow down, see the world a little more? just stay that way, stay that way. broken strings, just think of that. "i cant tell you something that ain't real"

i just simply love gray unmarried! woohoo. & for the last time <33 is really a song. and i did perms to my hair! and i simply loving it. haha once again, i like to do things to hurt my hair! just hope when the perm is gone, i will get in shock that my hair is long! hahah (:

(: (: (: (: (:

happy 4th of july(tomorrow) ppl! i am to lazy to blog about it tomorrow haha

PS:squirrel and events

in which addie and random updates

2009-06-26T23:09:00.000+08:00

random updates!

okay. so i got a week more off of holidays which is pretty awesome! get to rest and play a little more to study for CTs! and lesson been held by e-learning which i am so going to kill myself. classes on e-learning starts at 8am! i rather go school which starts at 10am sometimes 1pm. and now i have to sit and log on by 8am and if my internet is in a good mood, i have no complains.

anyway! i went to catch transforms 2! haha and its awesome! haha 2 and the half hour of shows which had me freezing in the show. seriously i was shaking. i can even hear my teeth goes "gergergergerger" anyway i am not the only one cold haha den, nic and alexis too. though alexis had his jacket on. it is still freezing cold! thats for not bringing a jacket on that day. and i thought i can embrace the coldness. fat hope!

anyway so all for going to school to meet up on project which end up den doing his hook up and his mind was lost in the process.(luckily he dont know my blog url) anyway haha the weather is freaking hot and i so happen no to bring my kit along that day. i swear i am sweating and smelling like hell...

and it had been weeks since i touch on snd stuff. i am not going to care what ever that stupid women going to say. if she can hear or cant hear its her business i will still score. no matter what MYY or any of the teachers said, i still manage to do quite well and this year it will be well done.

oh. the worst part of the day have to happen at night. of all. and it is going to hurt like hell when i bath later. okay, so i got this bike at home and i was in the zone so i wanted to go for a ride and not even, not even 1 min, i have to have an accident. okay its not as bad as you are thinking right now. i did not lose my head, my arm or my bone. i lost a forefinger size of a huge cut on my feet, and i walk, i leave not only footprint but bloodly forefinger size footprint haha.

well, it stop bleeding for now though hhaah! and i am thinking of going to the beach to cycle tomorrow. now i can stay at home to bake cookies and feed the snail. okay that just came on my mind. the spongebob square pants cartoon when he lost his beloved gray the snail. okay! maybe cheesecake, cupcake. ohh!!!

anyway king of pop, farewell, i cant believe at the age of 50. and one of the 80s charlie's angel too, cant remember her name but two hollywood icons die on the same day.

anyway congrats to mae the woodpecker for scoring a lovely 2100/2400 for her SAT! and i got the 99/100 file on chem. i need to master that. so i can score for chem CT! haha she is a genius man. & i miss going out with her. it had been ages since we had our last laugh(thats sound somewhat wrong). she had been busy with the phy and stuff and yeah. we got to go out to have baked mussels!

& i felt empty(so random!) it meant to be a random post though.

god, my feet hurts!! is my last toe turning black or its already dark purple. and i post on msn that i am going to cut my hair and A happen to be online, she said its a good thing to do, to have a fresh new look and well my long hair is not bad too, think twice before cutting as she is trying to keep hers. well yeah i am thinking twice and yeah! haah i do also miss the old times, and the highlight of dropping your card! hha.

i saw the police with the pass the other day and i miss mine. seriously why cant they just let me keep it. though photos ain't touchable. :(

alright i am going to feel the pain now. off to have a bubble bath.

& stay that way till we meet! haha how cool is that to be the same height at the same age. though you did grew a little and you are older than me. but no fear i will be taller than you! i am aiming to reach the sky.... of my room! crazy, u really think i want to be a giant? you kidding me, i am already a mini giant! hhaa

PS: squirrel and cutting hair.

in which addie was blown away

2009-06-18T00:30:00.000+08:00

seriously i was blown away.

haha

okay so i was watching Penelope then you know the ending part where this beautiful music came out. and i finally figure out that the song is Hoppípolla by sigur ros, which means jump into puddles.

it was awesome! let me tell you. though the song wasnt in english and if you never listen to it properly it really do sound like english. its in iceland (if i am not wrong) and it is awesome. so i finally heard it on youtube and i was blown away. really. and the best part was i am sitting at my window seat when i hear this song and at the best tune of the song the wind just blow in(even though its hot) but it was like..... i cant put words into it. its just amazing! really...

i love my window seat and i love this song. hahha.

the damn internet connection is not working well and i been trying to log on to it for mins now that i seriously think if this post cant be posted on my blog. i will blog again tml.(: i love that song. my window seat. the night light. everything just is so peacefully not. damn i am in a good mood.

and i simply love the song!! okay i am going to post the lyric up in the original and the english version side by side. trying to get the music code for my blog! its just awesome!

Brosandi --- Smiling
Hendumst í hringi --- Spinning round and round
Höldumst í hendur --- Holding hands
Allur heimurinn óskýr --- The whole world a blur
nema þú stendur --- But you are standing

Rennblautur --- Soaked
Allur rennvotur --- Completely drenched
Engin gúmmístígvél --- No rubber boots
Hlaupandi inni í okkur --- Running inside us
Vill springa út úr skel --- Want to erupt from a shell

Vindurinn --- The Wind
og útilykt af hárinu þínu --- An outdoor smell of your hair
Ég anda eins fast og ég get --- I breathe as hard as I can
með nefinu mínu --- with my nose

Hoppípolla --- Jump into puddles
Í engum stígvélum --- With no boots on
Allur rennvotur(Rennblautur) --- completely drenched(Soaked)
Í engum stígvélum --- With no boots on

Og ég fæ blóðnasir --- And I get a nosebleed
En ég stend alltaf upp --- but I always stand up

Og ég fæ blóðnasir --- And I get a nosebleed
En ég stend alltaf upp --- but I always stand up

not only that, during brothers and sisters season 3, dream by Priscilla ahn is amazing too.

the world is a better place with great music! hhahah i am so in a good mood.(:

<33

note to self: get some sleep

PS: squirrel and hoppipolla

in which addie needs a damn good shoe or flip flop

2009-06-13T21:46:00.000+08:00

i dont care if its a shoe or a flip flop. its a damn good shoe i need man. i need something that my feet wont hurt so much after walking long distance. i need a shoe or a flip flop that carry me to places. damn darn damn. its so unfair. i got this flops that is giving me all the darn problem u can think of on the feet. this is so unfair why cant i ever get the perfect shoe? ahr!

anyway i went to the bird park today! wee! hahha and yes thats where the darn shoe thingy got to me.

finally holidays! its not even a school break more of a mugging time. so unfair. haha and yes 2 weeks later i will be having all the stupid test which i completely havent get my timetable. how sucky is this.

yeah. and i am going to ask my mum to hide my internet connection so i wont be spending time online and more of mugging from next week onwards.

PS: squirrel is more of a flip and flop person! haha

in which addie need ur help

2009-06-02T22:25:00.000+08:00

should i get sims3?

should

- its nicer
- its new
- its sims!

should not
- i am freaking broke
- i prefer sims 2 more
- waste of money
- will stop playing sims 2 haha

anyway i really dont know... and no one helping me. i am like a fighting with myself. ahr.. but deep deep down inside i really dont feel like getting any! haha and i also feel like closing my blog. haha

anyway its a feel like so dont spam me asking me not too. yes, u. haha

anyway i am really stuck with the stupid comm skills project and i can belive i did so bad for the pass two assgiment! gosh... cant let anyone see those marks man. waiting for csi to be show by then i will get more ideas to do the damn conflict. haha

anyway i will just blog till here. i got so many things to say but i am just too lazy to blog in. haha

note to self: move more!

PS: squirrel wants the forrest..

in which addie asked and replied

2009-05-31T21:55:00.000+08:00

i once posted this

and i always wonder this question, why cant two opposite sex be just purely friend? hmm...

and i was surfing just now and i saw this

Can man and women really be friends?

Can men and women be "just friends," or is sexual attraction between the sexes always inevitable? According to Rabbi Shmuley, men and women can be friends with members of the opposite sex, as long as they follow certain rules. He talks about platonic friendship between the sexes and shares his ground rules for opposite-sex friendships outside of marriage.

If a person isn't married, Rabbi Shmuley says it's perfectly all right to have friends who are members of the opposite sex. Society has moved away from polarizing the sexes, and today, men and women work together, go to school together and should be able to be friends, he says.

Things are different if you are married, Rabbi Shmuley says. It is possible to have an opposite sex friendship, but you cannot compromise certain borders:

1. You can't go out to late night dinners together. You can have lunch together in a public place, but you should not order alcoholic beverages. "The embers of attraction really can grow in situations like that, and suddenly it's not so innocent, it's not just friendship anymore," Rabbi Shmuley says.

2. You can't take long drives or long flights with the other person, even if it's for work. "Even if you have to work with a colleague [of the opposite sex], there are still certain boundaries you need to preserve," he says.

3. You cannot place yourself in any situation where romance can grow. "Romance grows when people are alone; romance grows when people tell secrets," Rabbi Shmuley says.

4. You can't share secrets with a platonic male or female friend that you don't share with your spouse. "Because then you're sharing an exclusivity with a member of the opposite sex that you're not with your partner, and that can lead to a big no-no," he says.

5. You should not be friends with ex-lovers.

taken from: lifestyle msn!

rule 5. haha uh hmm! haha *cough* you know i am talking about you! ;)

note to self: i think we can be just friends!

PS: Squirrel still thinks she cant get away!

in which addie did it all

2009-05-31T21:30:00.000+08:00

was homework-ing just now! haha i know thats not even a word. i finally completed my maths by 4.30pm! and had been playing sims2 till now! which is around 9.30pm. haha and yes, sims 3 is coming out on the 2 of june! and i am not getting! yeah. i think i will be loyal to my sims 2 haha anyway i shall see but chances are not high!

anyway today i woke up like super early wanted to complete my work early so i got up at 8! on the dot. then went to slack around till 10am haha :D yeah i know but hello, i am not some early birdie! haha

so i went to do some of the maths and around 12pm i headed for the pillows and i cant sleep. i wanted to have a nap. so i flip and turn till i got so pissed! haha anyway i went to the kitchen and had a glass of cold water with ices and i saw the clock, it showed 4pm! i was damn shocked. the worst thing is that i saw my mum cutting the meat. i seriously thought she was about to prepare dinner! seriously. i even asked her, she was like, yeah, its for dinner and i asked if the clock was right she never reply. so i thought seriously. i raced to my room, only to reliazed it was 2pm! i was like.... seriously and then she came up and laugh.

thank a lot!

so after that i been doing maths and reading through some test on wed. and thank god! i seriously though i been slacking on the bed for like 4 hours! hahaha

anyway darn darn, my heart been beating like super fast! hmm

note to self: think slow

PS: squirrel said: just because she is beautiful doesnt means she can get away with murder!

in which addie and the week

2009-05-29T20:55:00.000+08:00

hey world! haha

anyway today is today, today is going to end, today is the day i love today. alrightie! haha i got like tons of math yet to complete and also need to do biology report and study chem.. the real practical is coming up and also need to do some seriously project work. and chem tutorial which had to hand in, in softcopy. but, i cant do the sketch. i dont bother also. i wonder how i did for math. haha

life is just like this. and i am missing my ex-classmate, and yes, everyone...i have no idea why. haha read two entire magazine on the way home. the magazine is ELLE and CLEO. and yes i read every single page and word. that you can know how long i take to go home. :( and den wasnt there to company me and i was so freaking bored. and somehow i am sick of listening to my mp3.

blah blah blah was in my head for the last chem lecture, i am so dead. my three science's lecture sort of brought me to another world. the whole darn lesson i was either looking at those around me playing facebook which i mean around me, so the left and right and front and back, or i am chatting on msn. i dont know why it just dont make me want to play facebook but i rather take a back seat and watch them play.

3 hours of drama tomorrow and i done nothing. for the past two weeks of break, i was rushing tons of math and catching up with my sleep or simply doing homework. and the worst part is, i was watching movie during physic and yeah.... so you can see, how slacky i am...

bad addie!

hmmmm.... seriously i really really wonder why.

note to self: take a deep breath and count to ten

PS: squirrel mugging big time!

in which addie is really bored

2009-05-27T18:31:00.000+08:00

i am really bored and i dont want to do more math!

math math math and more math! wth

haha

anyway i am blown away with all those crap, all those lies and hello, seriously move on! haha anyway its a bad thing to blog hop now and to see that they twist and turn the facts around the lies. ahr! and i am so bored! i dont want to do more math! i dont want to do more math or science! i dont want

oh, on the bright side of life, i was totally a serious slacker in wed's class. i seriously dont get any any idea what the teacher is talking about the first week then the 2nd then the 3rd, i gave up. so then we got to do this crappy drawing, which is like.... i faint! the computer just simply hates me, when most of the class got postive for z, i got negative for z. then hover around till i got a postive which was a bit too late.

and the worst thing is i totally dont understand. BUT! just but today, i finally did a drawing by myself. on a great start, i bought a lollipop haha and guess what, the 2nd lesson was like crap, 2 on my left were playing chess and the one on my right was talking about blue's clue! yes that kid show, a blue dog with a blue forprint to seek for clues, with this really red handy- something notebook. haha and a thinking chair, get it? nope, no childhood! anyway its like i was laughing all the way thanks to that. anyway and i did the damn progamme all my meself! clap clap. a good day to start my day.

but seriously?

haha and so the class end like an hour early and i wanted to take the damn train home but it was like not open till 28 of may. i was like, seriously? took a cab home and the driver when round the inner road which i was like god, seriously. and i thought i got a great start!

i want to skip lesson! i dont want to freaking wait for like 3 hours for a boring lecture! darn darn

anyway i am back to maths again! god how i wish i still can slack around. dont tell me, its my choice!

note to self: save me

PS: squirrel and those tutorials!

in which addie just needs a, break

2009-05-24T18:09:00.000+08:00

just came back from lunch at some weird Chinese restaurant, foods okay... anyway finally had lunch with cancer and MA with is like, MA really dont know how to enjoy chinese food. haha

anyway i been seriously wasting my weekends. its like i been trying ways and means to stop doing any homework. i just dont want to think about the math test. its on monday which is tomorrow. which that, i cant sit myself to go through and paper. i am just simply lazy! too lazy to do all of it.

i seriously need a break. need to catch the wind and swing around. i just dont feel like doing anything. i am just tired. and i felt that i havent sleep enough!

oh god, its seirously like taking my life away, just pray that i do well for math and at least get 80 and above! okay, well i guess, i shall go back to see all the workings again and get a hang of it.

i need more tutiorals!

note to self: drink more water!

PS: squirrel is getting lazier!

in which addie is getting on

2009-05-22T20:46:00.000+08:00

yeah, i been too cracking enough this few day. and i manage to pissed off den today. haha oh yeah, i get it, i got to quit my crap. but seriously i been becoming her. which is like... oh my gosh, what the hell! anyway i will get back to me, i will. just give me a few more days.

there's no drama but i guess i got to sit myself down to do all the paper, after all maths test or whatever it is, is on monday. and i am sorry okay!

bet anyone will even tell me why i am even being me today, this post will some what seems senseless but, i dont know. i really dont. i guess that, it will come and i will be prepare for it. so yeah.

anyway rant rant rant, its all crap.

note to self: find back adeline

PS: squirrel and her lost soul mate.

in which addie felt she is getting shorter

2009-05-21T18:36:00.000+08:00

i am getting shorter! my bag is seriously getting heavier and heavier. :(

oh man i am getting shorter
and my bag had never been so heavy before... wonder what did i put in it.

anyway i am so happy that i change a new blogskin! haha yes! blog skin! haha and i am posting even more now. though some are seriously damn random.

seriously i am starting to hate school. this was what i want. and i did said i will never take back anything. i was offered, offered a chance to move there. follow what i want. and am i taking this seriously? i really dont feel good. i know i should not be fooling around. i lost the strength to move on.

thinking of what i had missed. am i that dumb to reject it? am i?
if not i will be gone by my birthday. but on the bright side, if i am really gone, i wont be meeting this new group of friends. yes, i take my stand! i love this place and i am not moving till after 3 years. after that, i will gladly move. so just give me the strength to move on. the strength to move on.

dude, seriously?

and i always wonder this question, why cant two opposite sex be just purely friend? hmm...

note to self: throw more things out of the bag

PS: squirrel got a message, snd will be change to 4.30, those cant make it, text me!

in which addie had a cca

2009-05-21T14:25:00.000+08:00

in which, my cca is called and i am proud to say it. its

HOMESTAY CLUB!

oh yeah!

note to self: pay attention to lecture!

PS: squirrel dont wish to take snd exam!

in which addie and her new blog

2009-05-20T19:11:00.000+08:00

yeah i know, its about time.

and its about time i get in touch with the world i am living in.

just came back from the movie,"the uninvited". its totally seriously awesome man! haha. yeah, love the writing, love the show! anyway after that, i totally decided to change my blog link. i know there's like no link to it. haha

anyway i cant text anymore. i over spent my limits. and i am like suppose to pay if i over my limits. so yeah, i am broke and i am broke! so dont text or call me, i mean, do text and call me. but i will choose randomly to pick up. haah sorry, bear with me till my next month.

oohhh, chem results is out! hope i can at least get a good marks. and got to thanks mae for teaching me over the nights!(:

checking results. 73/100 i am speechless, both in a good and bad way. i am neither here nor there, felt disappointed. felt so disappointed. its like i never put enough effort in it. damn i felt disappointed, am i too harsh on myself?

note to self: neither here nor there

PS: squirrel is sad!

in which addie is damn tired!

2009-05-17T19:18:00.000+08:00

i cant explain to you how tired i am feeling now.

i dont know if its about school or just because i slept like super late this few days.

i think i am falling sick. like seriously getting all fever up which is like super dangerous at this time. oh man, i need the strength to push on.

got this chem test or exam or whatever they call tomorrow. and i really feel like ditching it. and i dont know if i had finish my math homework. and there is a speech to memorize (thats not even snd!) and also there is snd. it may seems like there is so little, but trust me the time is seriously not on my side this time. where is the time? i miss it when i manage to get everything in the way. and now, i am pledding it to stay!

note to self: see a doctor if this carry on

PS: Squirrel needs the time!

in which addie and her so called life

2009-05-09T13:15:00.000+08:00

life was fine, which life i am referring to?

that life that i want or the life that i had to follow?

throw that aside... most of my best buddy in now camping! and i cant follow. darn the upcoming functions man! hope they had fun. though lesson finish at 3pm which took an hour to do the chem practical. yeah yeah, i can say dont spot test me. suddenly as me a simple question which i totally stone. come on, i was thinking what to have for dinner man.(and i know i just ate my lunch.) but its a process of life, to full my energy bar and to carry on... so anyway i was stoned.

slack in school till 5. 45pm and the rest went to report to come. though i totally forgot what time to report to school on monday, which is bio practical! and i am going to faint. i never pay any attention to the previous lesson. i was busy trying to connect my macie to the school's network and it just cant.

oh, how many people to let macie connect to Internet?
ans: 7, including me

dont ask. i know. haha

monday, school's going to end at 6pm. so totally hope H1N1 will go away but also hope it get to red alert and there shall be no school! yeah, i know i am contradicting myslef but come on, i really need a holiday!

anyway, as i said before, i will change my blog skin. just not now... i am still trying to figure out how to change it with macie.

note to self: 2 weeks of math homework to finish. chem, bio and phy to read on.

PS: squirrel, the mad mad scientist

in which addie is glad that she went to the loo

2009-05-06T19:12:00.000+08:00

the best ever thing happen today. haha damn funny... i shall cut it short..

anyway, after lunch me and 2 other friends went back to class. so it so happen that i really need to use the loo. so the both of them went to the class first. as it was enter by the student card, which i totally think mine was busted. anyway i was locked out, or that was what i thought i was.

so the door was locked and its like the machine which you tap the card was screwed up. so in the end, i totally thought they were putting a prank on me. which was not... haha one of them(which is a boy) tried to open the door and it was freaking lock so in the end as the rest of the class came to class, they saw the class was locked with the 2 of them inside. which so happen to be a guy and a girl. haha damn funny, all jokes and stuff that you, as a teenager can think of. haha

so in the end i was like" i am so lucky i went to the loo" though i must say, i did said "why must i went to the loo" which i totally take it back now. haha

anyway dont ask me to change my blog skin, i am kinda busy with the new school and homework and all sort, so i will find a time to fix it.

meanwhile, just read the current post.

note to self: nothing much to note about.

PS: squirrel and the jumpy bean.

in which addie and her new mac

2009-05-01T22:20:00.000+08:00

my new mac! woo lala.. haha though i can say i still cant get use to it.

all got to thanks cancer! got me this from London! damn cool man! its different key but its still damn cool.. haha and also i think its time for me to get a new blog skin! haha damn happy now. and got to do my homework man.

hope the swine flu will go away.. though when it level red, there wont be school! haha

till then(:

note to self: love this and love cancer!

PS: squirrel playing with macie!

in which addie had survive!

2009-04-24T16:54:00.000+08:00

survived!

first week of school! though school lesson in school was like "what the hell?!?" but i manage to pull through. the only thing is i need to use more of my past memories to depend on it.

lucky aisah is in the same school as me. though different class or course but we still get to meet up with each other to catch up on old times!

i am super broke now! need to think twice before i use my money.

note to self: blog later!

PS: squirrel need to sleep! haha

in which addie just do a quick update

2009-04-18T21:06:00.000+08:00

hey blog..

anyway i know i havent been updating after the last post on my job update. finally hand in the dddaamn card to them. ASShole man. ask so many stupid question and i havent get my 2 day pay!! yes 2 day pay!

anyway, been to orientation and it was awesome, also i think we are the most happening class compare to the other class. anyway so many tiny details, i dont think i have to update.... haha i rather tell anyone who ask me than blog it. afterall, some memories are best to be share through words... plus making friends not my age, i think i will get a hang of it soon. going home from school take an hour! damn tiring but lucky den is there to company me for half of the distance.

meeting all ex-classmate for lunch on monday! hope can make it. the timetable all different! darn! school starting on monday! sad! i cant get to enjoy life! i cant image myself having to study during the normal school holiday!

guess what after 5 years i took my braces off! woo lala. off the braces gain the thin metal behind my lower set of teeth. anyway today i felt super awesome! went to this place to eat. suppose to meet sofia but she cant make it. so the rest of us went to eat. free lunch from dancing pole! thanks! its super cheap man. 3 of us, less than 25 bucks!

haha! anyway i am going to chew tons of stuff now!

tata.. this was suppose to be a quick and short update... oh i where's the short

also happy birthday to you! thanks for brightening my day!

note to self: need a bag

PS: squirrel enjoying nut!

in which addie in the zone

2009-04-07T21:31:00.000+08:00

in nothing zone. had no idea what to place the title as.

i just finished reading for one more day. got the book for a week plus and finally set aside all the things to read it. complete within a day! nothing to be proud of, haha i once finished a book within 2 hours! yeah yeah,throw aside, addie.

i will be handing over my pass on 8 april 2.30pm. have you even see a person send a resignation letter by email? meet me and i dont even bother to type it, had A to type it for me. still not feeling to type their names down. let cancer read it once and send by email to 2 person. and later some women named rachael called to meet her and return the pass to her. what the hell. ask them to do the pass, they take forever to approve it and now to return within an hour they book a date! going to waste my afternoon with them in HR! crap i had plans already man. though my plans is to slack around in pjs, but its still plans!

anyway i did not find a new blogskin, dont ask me why. i just simply love this one.

'sigh'... i will never understand a guy's thought. i mean i will never understand his thought. 'sigh'

note to self: find the meaning of understand.

PS: squirrel not in the mood of nutting.