welcome to my blog. is a little bit of everything happening in my life. okay a little bit more than a little. fine! a little more than a little by a little :D
all my post are copyrighted.

addie(:
there's nothing wrong with my name.
If you think you know me, read my blog and think again.
I'm imperfect yet I'm Lovin' It
I'm the only witness and the only person who can judge my life.
This is my blog so Click here if you hate it.

curtains draw.
lights shine.
people talk, sing, dance.

everything happens in a order.

I woke up this morning to a different tune, a tune which reminds me of body jam.

yes people, i finally attend the class. like finally! thank you very much! it was very enjoying. very fun indeed. my VIP pass just ended as of today(or is it tomorrow?) anyway, i miss lesson today. thinking i have another lesson on my list today. which( i dont want to talk about)

i have a hard time thinking should i write again. both my blog and short stories... addie needs to be really emotional to write a good story. yet i am not that emotional. hyper at least. not emotional. so i am moving baby steps. writing my blog and from there to my short stories. I will write them, and finish them. I promise. not write the head and half of the body and leave it hanging. hanging like a dead meat in the air. waiting for anyone to eat them. just hang there and bled. bled and bled and bled.

relax i am fine. very fine. told you i am hyper. pretty unstable now. very unstable.

So i need ideas to start on a story soon. need a someone to take good photos of/for me now. i think i am going to start posting photos on my blog, link them to my life and all.. saw AB's blog. its awesome. with mostly place into different parts of the blog, photo, him, music...things like that. labels. i need labels.

i need to label people. I am wondering why do human act the way they do. I simply dont understand why. Am I like an animal? when you are the human looking at me looking at you? but deeply you are here to watch me react to your actions and when you know i have given up, you walked away, telling yourself that you need to catch my attention the next round.

hmm...


why am i always half done? medium rare. always. my stories, my guitar, my drama(okay not really), my life, my weight.

ahh.. my weight. Thanks for the little celebration. Its really nice and sweet of you guys! and i sworn i gain like 2Kg after that day! haha Kidding, i didnt! but thank you. I am left with 8 more! cant wait. should, hopefully by the end of this year. which i am pretty proud that i did it. pissed at the same time for letting myself go like that before. need to stop blaming what happen that time when i let go of myself.

now, just now, i am returning to me. getting stronger. facing life with a back up of life.

seriously, maturity dont come with age. you cant blame on parents or family background. you cant. maturity is something that you grow and culture it. you learn it yourself. you "upgrade" yourself. no one teaches me maturity. of course the basic, yes. but not the I, I am now. I came from a life of lessons. and i am still learning. so should you, which i suppose you should at this point in life. when you are entering adult hood. for me, my teenager-hood has a certain good years to enjoy and yet i am feeling so much mature than you are.

and now i am confuse. do i want you as my friend or enemy? who wants enemy? only you do. i am always in peace till you step on my line of defense. till you did the utterly horrifying things to our friendship. and i wonder did what happen to * and i, became the way i treat friends now. from another angle? i doubt that. i made new friendships and i have them way better in control than this. simple childish is all i can say. and those who known me before, prefer the me now than before, lets just say, my trip to stay with my brother really make me grow alot.

sometimes, you are blessed by this little things and it changes you for life. in a good way.

till then,
stay beautiful and smiles
xoxo,
addie(:

only one game is needed this time.

run and hide people, run and hide.

today marks the start of this game, though it should be tonight but lets all have a 4 hours head start.

there is only one rule. and thats never ever be lower than anyone.

it only applies to me. so yeah.

i will be gone for the next few days, those who are checking right here, should know where to contact me.

i finally understand what make a human that desperate. all those needs. its disgusting yet it makes us all human.

on a lighter note, i dont have my 3rd dream, but i do hope it comes soon.

as always,
smile and stay beautiful
xoxo
addie(: